We can do it

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Of all the men I loved before

Ok , Carly, here ya go. Some stuff from my past...
Frankly, there are no other men I loved before other than my husband. Ok, ok so you are rolling your eyes right now, but I have to be honest, Dan is the ONLY man I was ever in love with. After reading this you may understand why and applaud me for jumping at the chance to marry Dan.
1. My very first date was with this very handsome guy named Bryan. He was 19 and I was 16. He met my horrible and intimidating brothers and never called again.
2. Boyfriend #1 was a friend of Dan's - who I dated AFTER dating Dan in highschool. Big mistake. Most people believe he is likely to be the next unibomber - either than or will turn into my gay neighbor Larry. My brothers hated him because he did not own 1 single pair of pants - when he went to the desert in the winter to visit his dad in prison, he had to borrow his little sister's pants.
3. Boyfriend #2 Jeff. A decent guy but we were an odd mix. I was the prim and proper pastor's daughter who loved to wear pink. He had long hair and wore torn Metallica tee shirts everywhere - including church. He barely graduated highschool and had no plans for the future - very unlike my goal oriented self, but I adored him anyway. My brothers hate HIM because they swore they saw him wear bicycle shorts one day - an unforgivable crime.
4. Boyfriend #3 Kent. He was my first serious boyfriend in college. He cried about everything. We went to go see A Walk In the Clouds on our first date and did not cry - he SOBBED. Then he looked over at me and said, "you're not crying?". He cried over everything - especially wheat fields.(He was from Montana and missed them so bad....ick) Does he need more of a reason for my brothers to hate him?
5. Boyfriend #4 Todd aka Comb Over Guy. Yes, he had a comb over. He was 24 at the time. He was also very short. I have no idea why I dated him. He had just broken up with a girl who was gorgeous. He told me I was not nearly as pretty. How is it short ugly guys get such great women? My brothers hated him purely for his comb over.
This was all before the time I was 20 years old and I was disillusioned to the world of men. And then...
6. Dan. My brothers like him. So I married him.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, honey you can't possibly forget the dental hygiene guy (toothbrush). Anyway, thank the good Lord in heaven he sent us our wonderful husbands!!! The pickins were slim!

Love you
Shan

Gabrielle Eden said...

Your brothers sound great! And you're also a PK? Wow.

Gingers Mom said...

My brothers are the best, really. I am thankful for all the scaring away they did. I dodged some real bullets that way.
Yup, born and raised a PK. Lord help me.

Trailady said...

WOW- you sound a lot like me. I didn't date much- just didn't want to play the silly game. My first & only sex partner was the man I've been married to for 13 years. I'm still in love with him!!! By the way, my hubby is also a PK.

DreadPyrateRobert said...

You forgot to mention Gandhi and Pothole. I mean seriously, where did you come up with these guys. It looked like a refugee camp. FOR THE RECORD...Jeff aka Shlumpy did in fact wear bicycle shorts in my presence and almost got beat with the candlesticks (forevermore known as the Shlumpysticks)
Kent - I loved making the guy cry...whatta spaz.
Thank GOD for Dan. I hate to think of what might have happened otherwise.

Love ya.

Robert aka Big Brother(Who is in fact watching you)

Gingers Mom said...

Ok, Rob. So I left a few out. "Ghandi" as you called him was actually a nice guy. And "Pothole" I only went out with once and he took me Hometown Buffet.

DreadPyrateRobert said...

Yeah, I'd have left them out too. I only call it Pothole cuz it had the IQ of yer average fence post. Hitting a pothole while he was driving was the only way to jog his memory.


MMMMmmmm.....Hometown buffet...brown, hot and plenty of it. Yummy, wasn't he a tasty treat.

Robert aka Big Brother(Who is in fact watching you)

Miss Kelly said...

Hi ROB! Greetings from the North.
Kristin, just for that, I'll be posting a picture of you and Ryan Burke, if I can get a hold of one.
PS - Jay Ellit is now good-looking. Can you believe that?

Carly-Ann said...

I love this stuff! Wasn't that fun Kristin???

IMMomsDaughter said...

I expected some lovey dovey story. This was cute! Congrates on finding the right guy, with a little help from your vetting board of brothers ;)

Mommy off the Record said...

Thank goodness your brothers finally liked someone! :)

Thanks for sharing this for my 100th post celebration!