We can do it

Thursday, April 19, 2007

A big hug from the universe

Silly Gingers Mom. I had to run into the commissary because my FIL is coming over for dinner tonight and I have no food. I figured, I only need a few things so how bad could it be with all three kids. Bwahahahah!

First off, I had to wake Stinky up from his nap. Much screaming ensued.

He actually flung himself into the street and laid down in front of a car in the parking lot. Many glares and shocked "Oh my's".

I get into the store and while the three of them are doing their best to give me a coronary, some old man walks up to me and says, "I saw you playing with those kids in the parking lot. Why not have 3 more?"

Withering smile, I reply, "Oh I think we are done now"

Old man, "Yeah...I should hope so..."

I clamp my mouth shut seeing as he is an old man and I do have my little kids with me.

Thoughts running through Gingers Mom's head:

1. Well, my son is 2 1/2. What is your excuse for being an asshole?
2. Yes, I am sure you are the one person on earth other than Mary who had perfect children. I am sure there is a throne waiting for them right next to Jesus.
3. F.U.

Moving on, I had another "proud to be their momma" moment in the frozen foods aisle. I was looking around for ice cream for my husband....even though I am still on WW.... and I hear Red yelling....LOUDLY...

"Hey look...COCKSUCKERS!"

Not once, not twice but several times.

I turn around, white faced. She is staring at the Popsicles. Everyone else is staring at me. I thought about taking a bow.

Gingers Mom. Reigning champion of the unruly potty mouths. Thank you!


kelly said...

Holy crap - cocksuckers?! I love it!
As for the old man - I'd have told him to lick me where the sun don't shine.

Caro said...

Hee hee hee hee hee. Cocksuckers!

Oh that's priceless.

I hate judgemental people glaring at my kids in public.

I loved the line about the thrones next to Jesus. You should have used it. :P

Mike, Nicki, and Josh said...

That story is hilarity in words. I'd like to hope that the old man was just trying to be humorous for humor's sake, but having been in similar situations with Josh when strangers' comments have stung me, I can relate. If people spent half as much time looking at their own shortcomings as they did making judgements about other people, the world would be a much happier place.

Next time kick the old guy in the nards (don't think I've used that word since the 80s).


Kerry said...

Cocksuckers! That is great!
My son had a full blown tantrum in a parking garage once, right in the middle of the drive, rolling around on the ground, screaming, head spinning, vomiting pea soup, the whole thing.
I just let him go.
When people looked at me I gave them the....."Isn't he cute" look and then said "if you don't move on, I'm sending him home with you".
Worked like a charm.

Catch said...


Mike, Nicki, and Josh said...

Gas: $40.00
Getting Dinner for your FIL: $35.00
Hearing your girl say, "COCKSUCKERS" at the commissary: priceless

QueenieCarly said...

What an awful day. While the cocksuckers thing is funny, I can't help but feel so bad for you. I can't believe the people you encounter who say the absolute worst things. You poor girl.

Ms.L said...

I may have to start calling them that;p
Sorry you had a shitty time of it:(

Pendullum said...

And now I will never look at a popcicle again without thinking of your special day!!!

Trailady said...

Oh my! Gotta love it. You handle everything with such great humor. I lost mine somewhere along the line, so I enjoy coming here for a giggle. Maybe someday I'll find my comedic side- I take things far too seriously sometimes and it will give me gray hairs I'm sure.

Good for you, Honey- keep laughing!!!!!! :o)

tAnYeTTa said...

hahahhaaaa.....cocksuckers. was this right after they came from the christian preschool. OMG that was too funny. kids are sooooooooo cute and very very honest! i love it.

ps.. i like choice #3 to the old man. moving on~ haha.