Gingers Mom

Backhanded Love

2011-10-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

My little Brady has a big heart. When he feels the love it just oozes out of him as though he will burst if it's not expressed and showered upon those around him. (this goes for when he is in a bad mood to, mind you) But it is something I admire about him.

So the other day I could see the delirium of love washing over him as he climbed onto my lap. He started rubbing my leg with his sweaty little boy hand and gazed into my eyes. (I'm telling you girls...you're in big trouble...) He sighed a big sigh and said dreamily... "Do you know who my favorite mommy is?"

I smiled, recognizing the little game we play. "Is it me?"

He beamed and hugged me enthusiastically.

Then he leaned back, rubbed my leg again, and gazed into my eyes. Then paused....looked down...looked back up to me and said.

"Um...I think you need to shave those."

Control

2011-09-20T20:14:00.000-07:00

I had an epiphany this week. About parenthood. It seems in our society today we have a certain level of expectations for children. Particularly in Christian circles, but you can see it in all kinds of groups. How well do you "control" your children? If you have wild, woolly and free spirits like I do - you know what I am talking about. We are judged as parents by how well our kids listen, behave and respond to our directions.

As parents we have a job to do. To raise up our kids with boundaries, love, consequences and rewards and to guide them in the direction we want them to go. So if you want to define THAT as controlling your kids - I'm all for it. But it seems to me that many people have this expectation that our kids should be robots. Following our directions without deviation, compliant and quiet and doing so happily.

But I had a thought about God. And how all our relationships on this earth are a reflection of something He wants us to learn about Him. We are His kids, right? And He gave us the gift of free will. He loves us, guides and instructs us and allows consequences to come our way. And yet he does not "control" us - even though He is capable.

What this tells me is that I should NOT control my kids. I should love them and instruct them and allow consequences to come their way. I'm not capable of controlling their behavior and it seems to me that God doesn't want me to do that either.

Kids are born with a temperament. Parents of strong willed kids again, know what I am talking about. The kids that inevitably break out in a brawl in the middle of the grocery store...every time no matter the consequences. The kids who poke and prod and poke and prod until an unwitting sibling returns with a full blown assault - in front of your pastor. Certain things cannot be disciplined out of them -it's the way God designed them and WANTED them to be. Although it should be guided and nurtured and "bridled" - it is who they are. Some kids are compliant and happily go along the easy path. Others live to fight another day, and inevitably end up grounded...again. I'm not saying that discipline is useless - heck, it sometimes is the only tool we got! But it won't change certain natural, inborn tendencies, like temperament.

I've been judged and pegged as a bad parent alot. It is refreshing to believe that I can do the best that I can - seeking guidance from God in raising my kids and at the end of the day, I'm not responsible to CONTROL my kids. They make their choices. My job as mom is to respond to those choices.

I know this may seem like a shocking and lackadaisical point of view of parenting. But it is far from that. It's a realization that I am the perfect parent to my child in all my imperfections because God chose me to be their mom. And I don't have to answer to all their behaviors, but to love and encourage and discipline and guide them to the best of my abilities. God gave us the freedom to make our own choices and to be us and our kids deserve the same considerations.

Sarcasm 101

2011-09-06T15:11:00.000-07:00

Red: Mommy, why don't you like peace symbols?

GingersMom: Because they don't represent peace, the represent socialism

Red: What's socialism?

GM: People who believe in things we don't believe in.

Red: You mean like unicorns?

GM: Yes. Exactly like unicorns

You. Are. SOOOOOOOOOOO. Embarrassing.

2011-08-04T10:41:00.000-07:00

I knew this day was coming. One day my little girl who used to look up at me with such admiration and awe would see me an roll her eyes and be mortified. What I DIDN'T know was that I would become this giant loser by the time she was only 8.
Lucky for me there are still glimmers of her being impressed by me. Like when the girls in her 3rd grade class begged her to have me (ME!!) be a chaperone on a field trip because I look like a COOL mom and have pink hair. (I'm COOL, people!)

But then the next day as I pull up to the curb in front of the school with the radio blasting and I'm belting out the lyrics enthusiastically she suddenly finds me horrifyingly embarrassing. I totally don't get it. Maybe it was the bright yellow and green St. Patricks Day pajamas I was still sporting?

So I am resigned to the idea that I have entered full time dorkdome in the eyes of my pre-pre-teen. So I might as well embrace it. My ideas include but are not limited to:

1. Dancing disco as I blare Justin Bieber in my car when I pick her up from school and shouting - "I've got the Bieber Fever!" Maybe I can get a bumper sticker too....

2. As she leaves for school I can ask her, loudly, if she remembered to put on clean underwear?

3. While talking with her friends I can play with her hair and ask her if she'd like pigtails again like she wore on Saturday and I can put big pink bows in it too!

4. Wear nothing but bunny slippers and duckie pajamas whenever her friends are around.

Hmmmm...any other juicy ideas out there?

Now take a look at these...really...embarrassing is in the genes.

Ok, so maybe it's a little more obvious in me. Poor girl.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

2011-07-25T16:28:00.000-07:00

This year is a year full of changes. We moved from Hawaii to San Diego. We bought a house. My husband will be deploying this year. My youngest child will be starting Kindergarten. I'll be a Stay at Home Mom with no kids at home during the day.

Too much change!

So while I am in the throws of a serious identity crisis I have come up with a lot of different ideas for filling my time this coming fall while I am all on my lonesome.

1. Go back to school for: Masters in social work, fashion design, photography
2. Learn how to knit, pottery, sew (for those of you who know me you realize how preposterous this is)
3. Get a part time job
4. Eat every cupcake I can possibly find and become the greatest cupcake critic of all time.

And although some of these seem totally reasonable (especially the cupcakes) I seem to be at a crossroads where none of them seem to be panning out.

6 weeks people and my life is going to be so strange! What to do, what to do....

Suggestions?

Cool Program to Keep Me From Going Bonkers

2011-07-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

As we all know I am not the world's best housekeeper. It is always a battle just to keep my head above water and not get crushed under the avalanche of dirty laundry. Dan is always telling me - you need to DELEGATE to the kids. Ah, that magic word. Delegate. That might work in the military, my friend, but to these 3 little anarchists there is no such luck. I find myself winding up into a tirade that none of them listen to while I end up doing all the chores anyway and they sit back, eating popcorn and snickering at mommy's meltdown.
A friend of mine recently recommended a program to me called Accountable Kids. I secretly mocked it for a while, but then took a peek after she swore to me it was life altering. I've tried doing it all myself. I've tried chore charts, sticker charts, marble jar rewards, grounding, threatening, screaming and all out war. So far, my kids are perfectly irresponsible little hooligans. (Whom I love and adore). But I know how much I struggle with day to day maintenance and diligence and I worry often about passing on a legacy of disorganization and frustration.
Accountable Kids has been very promising for our family. It is for families of all kinds, normal to dysfunctional and all in between. The appealing part to me is that it works very well for families with ADHD. Keeping structure in our home is both imperative and nearly impossible. Myself and my 2 kids with ADHD find structure comforting but very hard to maintain. This sounds like a crazy infomercial, but truly this program is really working for us.
My kids get up in the morning and do their "core chores" (the chores every member has to do because they are a member of our family) and I don't have to remind them....at least not a fraction as much. After the first week of not running out the door screaming... "We're late....get in the car!!!!" and driving up to the school for an emotional meltdown because we forgot our homework...AGAIN.... I was impressed.
It basically goes like this. There are core chores that you can personalize for each child and for your needs as a family. For example...make bed, breakfast, brush teeth, homework.... They are broken into morning, afternoon and evening chores. After each block of chores is completed they get to cash it in for a "ticket." Ah these tickets are strangely magical. They seem to hold more value that even the money we dangle above their greedily little heads. Tickets are exchanged for rewards. Hot commodities in our house are "Screen time" (TV, video games, movies) and staying up late. This has also been the most effective way I have found in limiting their time glued to the brain sucking TV. For the first time in months, my kids have been creative, played together, used their toys!
Beyond core chores there are Extra Chores. These are the ones you are willing to pay for. When my kids do an extra chore they earn a "Bonus Buck". For us...to start... Bonus Bucks are worth 50 cents. But it can be adjusted to what works for your family. I will happily pay to have my dishwasher emptied and laundry put away and dog poop scooped. And the kids happily will do it for me for these magical little cards. For my kids, they also like to trade in bonus bucks for Tickets. Sometimes we let them. I love that this program is flexible to our needs.
I am an all or nothing person. So if I start a diet or a regimen of any sort and I veer from the path at all, I tend to give up. This Accountable Kids program has really helped me because each day starts over new.

The basic program is like this:

Each child has their own board with 5 pegs to hold cards.
1. The first peg holds core chores that the child will go through in any order you choose. When completed they flip that card over to the second peg that says "Finish". The child earns a Ticket that can be traded for rewards. They have the potential to earn 3 a day.

2. Extra Chores - these are chores you are willing to pay for. After they are completed your child earns a bonus buck that will be traded at the end of the week for money.

3. Best Behavior Cards - these are awarded when you see positive behavior you are trying to encourage. They can be used as tickets or put into a drawing at the end of the week for a prize. We use them as tickets. These are awarded sporadically and kids may not ask for them.

4. Privilege Pass - this is used to eliminate negative behavior. Target one negative behavior at a time (something that happens daily usually) and reward your child with a Privilege Pass. They can be used to purchase special privileges that can’t be bought with regular tickets. The privilege should be an incentive your child is willing to work for. We haven’t used this yet.

5. Special Date Card: for each day that the child earns 3 tickets (completes the whole program that day) they earn a star on the date card. After 10 stars the child earns a special date with a parent, grandparent, etc. I love this because it promotes bonding time which sometimes we need as parents too! It can be something big like going to a movie, or something simple like a 10 minute walk.

I know this sounds too good to be true. But I am thrilled with what it has done for our family. There are certainly still challenges and we are currently working on the QUALITY of the work they are doing, but we are leaps and bounds where we were a month ago. The house seems more peaceful and more creative. On a scale of 1-5 (5 being the highest) I would rate this program a 5. For real. One of the main reasons is that it is structured but not overly strict. It allows you to tailor it to your needs as a family. Nothing worse that a parenting book or tool that makes you feel like a loser and have been doing it all wrong. I take my parenting ideals and knowledge and apply it with the help of the structure this program provides.
Check it out. It's worth a look.

Military Spouse Appreciation Day

2011-05-06T08:39:00.001-07:00

The Military Wife

Over the years, I've talked a lot about military spouses ... how special they are and the price they pay for freedom too. The funny thing about it, is most military spouses don't consider themselves different from other spouses. They do what they have to do, bound together not by blood, or, merely friendship, but with a shared spirit whose origin is in the very essence of what love truly is. Is there truly a difference? I think there is. You have to decide for yourself.

Other spouses get married and look forward to building equity in a home and putting down family roots. Military spouses get married and know they'll live in base housing or rent, and their roots must be short so they can be transplanted frequently.

Other spouses decorate a home with flair and personality that will last a lifetime. Military spouses decorate a home with flare tempered with the knowledge that no two base houses have the same size windows or same size rooms. Curtains have to be flexible and multiple sets are a plus. Furniture must fit like puzzle pieces.

Other spouses have living rooms that are immaculate and seldom used. Military spouses have immaculate living room/dining room combos. The coffee table gota scratch or two moving from Germany, but it still looks pretty good.

Other spouses say good-bye to their spouse for a business trip and know they won't see them for a week. They are lonely, but can survive. Military spouses say good-bye to their deploying spouse and know they won't see them for months, or for a remote, a year. They are lonely, but will survive.

Other spouses, when a washer hose blows off, call Maytag and then write a check out for getting the hose reconnected. Military spouses will cut the water off and fix it themselves. Other spouses get used to saying "hello" to friends they see all the time. Military spouses get used to saying "good-bye" to friends made the last two years.

Other spouses worry about whether their child will be class president next year. Military spouses worry about whether their child will be accepted in yet another new school next year and whether that school will be the worst in the city ... again.

Other spouses can count on spouse participation in special events ... birthdays, anniversaries, concerts, football games, graduation, and even the birth of a child. Military spouses only count on each other; because they realize that the Flag has to come first if freedom is to survive. It has to be that way.

Other spouses put up yellow ribbons when the troops are imperiled across the globe and take them down when the troops come home. Military spouses wear yellow ribbons around their hearts and they never go away.

Other spouses worry about being late for mom's Thanksgiving dinner. Military spouses worry about getting back from Japan in time for dad's funeral.

And other spouses are touched by the television program showing an elderly lady putting a card down in front of a long, black wall that has names on it. The card simply says "Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. You would have been sixty today." A military spouse is the lady with the card. And the wall is the Vietnam Memorial.

I would never say military spouses are better or worse than other spouses are. But I will say there is a difference. And I will say that our country asks more of military spouses than is asked of other spouses. And I will say without hesitation, that military spouses pay just as high a price for freedom as do their active duty husbands or wives. Perhaps the price they pay is even higher. Dying in service to our country isn't nearly as hard as loving someone who has died in service to our country and having to live without them.
God bless our military spouses for All they freely give!
By Colonel Steven Arrington 17th Training Wing vice commander Goodfellow AFB San Angelo, Texas from the Goodfellow Monitor 11May01

Is Blogging a dying Selfish indulgence?

2011-04-28T15:26:00.000-07:00

I used to love to blog. I spent many an hour hiding from my children and escaping into my personal rants and enjoying others in the same boat. It is therapeutic and fun and was a creative outlet for me. And although I find myself with more and more free time as my hooligans get older I find myself with nothing to say. Admittedly Facebook is a much easier outlet where one can leave pithy remarks and get chuckles with little or no effort.

I'm not sure if I'm interesting enough to keep it going. But I do love looking back at all the funny anecdotes about my kids that really...no one reads but me. Haha. Maybe if I get the ball rolling again I will find more witty things to say. But lately...for a long while now...I feel my wit and creativity have dried up. Blogville seems quiet. Maybe everyone else shifted over to FB to get their laughs. Thoughts? Cricket...cricket..... Anyone? Bueller??

Pearls of Wisdom

2011-01-25T09:17:00.000-08:00

This article was in the Washington Post. I am pretty sure it was written after some secret mission to excavate my innermost thoughts. Enjoy.

January 24, 2011 - OK, so only my husband voluntarily CHOSE to live with me...the other three, and the dog, I either made or bought, so I try to give them a break. After all, with me as a mom, sometimes it's like being given an 18-year Gulag sentence the moment they were born.

My kids are thinking, "Where was the trial? Did I have a defense? Where's Jack McCoy when you need him?"

So, they do what any hardened criminal, convinced of their own innocence would do. They riot. They may not be burning the place down, but don't think I haven't already rid the house of incendiary devices, just in case.

I think my husband leaves work every day and braces for the inevitable tsunami of destruction and debris from the day's events.

Last night, two of the three were in mismatched jammies and the third was wearing part of his Halloween costume. They were playing war, in our bed. I'm not sure how the game is played, but it's loud, and I think the pillows filled the role of either prisoners-of-war or weapons.

Maybe both.

I, dutifully, as in all great wars, was Switzerland. Hearing the shrieks -- which, given your state of mind, could have been of grand fun, or terror...I'm content to assume the former -- he says to me, "should we see what's happening down there?"

It was the "we" that got me thinking...ergo: The Rules

1. "We" is either something very small, or a French term of agreement. When referring to our small terrorists, if it is an activity that should be investigated, it is either you, or me. If it's you, go in peace and with my greatest blessings. If it's me, unless they're holding a bottle of wine hostage, I'm not going down there.

2. Unless one of your siblings is either broken, bleeding, or on fire, I don't want to know about it.

3. When you become a famous and well-paid critic, you may pass judgment on dinner. Until then, you're still the people who chew off your toenails and taste, if not eat, things you find in your nose. I'm not terribly concerned about your discriminating palate.

4. Please don't say something along the lines of "wow! did you see the news today?" Unless one of Dora the Explorer's stops is the New York Times building, I have no clue what happened. I can, however, tell you who went poop, and where they did it. Because that location changes ALL the time.

5. How I look is your best clue as to how the children behaved. When you come home and I'm unshowered and still wearing the same clothes as yesterday, assume your progeny behaved just as they did on Saturday when you started drinking at noon. If I, however, look like Betty Draper, your credit card will reflect the purchase of three first class tickets to Cuba. I'm sure we'll get a postcard at some point.

6. If you want me to play a guessing game - as in "mom, guess what?" or "dear, you'll never guess what happened today" - I want a handicap. For every wrong guess, I get to walk three paces away from you. With any luck, by the time I get it right, I'll be in Tahiti.

7. The decibel level of you calling for me is inversely proportional to the likelihood I'll answer.

8. When Zac Efron, Han Solo and Diego pay you thousands of dollars to put their faces on your t-shirts, shoes and backpacks, I'll shut up. Until then, we don't do endorsements.

9. If you close the bathroom door BEFORE assessing the toilet paper supply, as far as I'm concerned, you're on your own.

Ummm....

2010-12-31T11:41:00.000-08:00

Brady: Mommy, who was the first to come out of your body?

Me: Ummmmm?

Brady: I know, it was Daddy!!

cricket cricket (parenting at its best: denial)

Me: Daddy did not come out of mommy. Savannah was first.

Brady: Nope. Daddy came out of your body first. He's the biggest.

It's probably good daddy wasn't here. Surely, a puffed chest of pride and some dirty comments would have followed.

Play Ball!!

2010-12-20T17:11:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I guess they say that for Baseball. But what the hell...

We finally took some time to do a family photo down at "our" beach. Nostalgia is washing over me at any given moment. I feel like I am teary eyed most of the day as our time in Hawaii is edging nearer. So, we hired a photographer who's husband works with mine.

It took me a while to find a theme for our photo. I didn't just want plastic smiles and white shirts all around and we chase after and scream at the short loud people. Posed photos do not sit well with the hooligans.

So I came up with the idea of playing football at the beach. And it seems to have worked pretty well.

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL?!?

We had such a blast that day. We laughed so hard, played so hard and made so many wonderful memories. By the time we left the beach we were wet head to toe and had sand in ALL kinds of places. This is one of my most cherished days in Hawaii. So glad we got pictures to remember it by.

Christmas Partying 101

2010-12-18T19:28:00.000-08:00

Lesson #1 for Christmas partying Kristin style: If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

Lesson #2 : Cake is for all occasions. (just ask my local bakery...) But fruitcake? Although bursting with those delightful Christmas calories, avoid at ALL costs. I mean, have some standards.

Lesson #3: Avoid veggie trays. Anyone who serves veggies at a Christmas party has no Christmas spirit and should not be trusted. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door where they're probably serving Santa cookies. (see lesson #1)

Lesson #4: If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

Lesson #5: Consider proper attire. Stretchy clothing such as sweatpants are ideal. Be sure to avoid buttons, belts and anything binding. Elastic waistbands are your friend. Running shoes are highly advised. You'll need them to beat Aunt Margaret in the race for Santa cookies for sure. On a side note, Ugly sweaters are hilarious! At Ugly sweater parties. That Rudolph sweater vest can say “ironically horrible” or could be seen as “mother knitted to keep me snug.” It’s a fine line.

Lesson #6 Beware the Wardrobe malfunction! Christmas parties can be a great time to dress in your glittery finest (although men might want to reconsider the glitter). If it is a dressy affair...do not forget to give your party dress a trial run. This means sitting, bending and yes...dancing...in front of the mirror. Cleavage is a nice touch to the holiday...but you do not want to be forever known as the one that flashed boobage at the Christmas party.

And finally.....

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate and wine in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

My Husband's Letter to Santa

2010-12-05T18:56:00.000-08:00

Santa,

How are you? I am happy because I have been really good ALL YEAR. Really, all year. I had to put up with Kristin, so that should get me at least 4 or 5 presents. She was naughty. Give me her presents because I was good enough for two people. She also told Savannah that you were fake. I know better. She even tried to burn my face off.

I am going to have lots of goodies out for you and the reindeer. First, I'll have a 5 hour energy for you and the ponies. There will also be some home-made chocolate chip cookies I bought at the commisary. And, if you want to wash down those cookies into that bowl full of jelly with some hot cocoa you are in luck! There may be some Bailey's Irish creme in the medicine cabinet if you need to fight 'the sniffles' as well.

So, as stated, I've done my part. Here are some things I would be well pleased to receive as compensation-

2 jack stands (put under a car to keep it up)

a really really bright flashlight

a new backpack that doesn't have rips and tears in it
coal for Kristin's stocking

a brown suit for New Year's

Obama 2012 swag

that should be sufficient for now. There may be some other worthy ideas that I'll send in another mailing.

Most sincerely,

Daniel

Well, Merry Christmas!

2010-12-02T19:43:00.000-08:00

Some random thoughts for you today. This week people have found my blog by doing the following searches:

Squirting Peeing Pics
Thanks for Commenting on my Muffin Top Mom

Just food for thought.

On another note, every Christmas we hang this ornament on our tree...

You probably can't tell that this is a picture of me breastfeeding my daughter with Dan looking on. One might wonder how you get such a picture in the first place. Let me tell you, you have a mother in law like mine. Who then feels it would be so special to put on a Christmas ornament.

Nothing celebrates the birth of our Savior like some boobies. Right?

Save Some Money This Christmas ***MORE DEALS

2010-11-29T22:14:00.000-08:00

I have become addicted to saving money. Always looking for a new way to save, Dan says I am going to bankrupt us by saving money. Haha. But with the Holidays fast approaching, I figured how can't stand to learn a few ways to save money this Christmas?

My personal favorite...Swagbucks. I learned about this one at my MOPS (mother of preschoolers) group. I signed up for it last January and use it as my search engine instead of Google or Yahoo - it's totally free. It can seem tedious - like you aren't earning much but it adds up. I earned $200 in Amazon.com gift cards this year just by switching search engines. The key is never using the address bar. Type EVERYTHING into swagbucks.com. Going to Facebook? Don't go directly there...swagbuck it first. The points add up. You get rewarded usually 3-5 times a day. The best prize to exchange for is the amazon.com $5 card. We got our kids a free Nintendo DS and more for Christmas.

Ebates I just learned about this one from a friend on Facebook. Sign up for an account - it's free. Instead of going directly to a site, see if there is a link on ebates. They will give you cash back for certain websites. I live in Hawaii and most of my shopping has been online so I don't have to brave the post office during Christmas with my 3 short loud people. In 1 week I have earned back about $15. Just an extra little step online and you get yourself some money back. Not too bad... Certain sites you even get cash back for gift cards (like Nordstrom!)

Giftcardgranny You can purchase discounted gift cards here. Some are pretty inconsequential, but others are quite significant. And shipping is usually free. I would say 90% are from ebay auctions, but there are many with card companies and have good ratings. Even buying on ebay is not a bad idea if it is from a credible seller.

I just discovered this one today. And LOVIN it. HauteLook has all kinds of sample sales. I just bought some killer Dav peacock rainboots for less than $25 with shipping. The same brand on amazon was $70. They also have deals on True Religion jeans starting at $89 right now. Check it out, all. I think I'm in looooove.

I know there are a lot more deals out there. But these are the ones that are working for me. I hope you have a blessed Christmas. Mele Kalikimaka!!

The Bucket List

2010-11-28T20:44:00.000-08:00

With less than 3 months left in Hawaii, we have begun to scramble and get our Bucket List done. A Hawaiian Bucket List is a list of all the things you have not done (thinking you have enough time to do them during your tour) that you feel must be seen and done before you leave the island.

Today it was Dan's turn to choose a Bucket List item. He chose hiking (of course) and we headed off to hike to Manoa Falls. The whole way there my kids were reading my mind...

"I want to go home!"

"I don't want to hike"
"No hiking, no hiking!"
"My legs hurt"
"I'm tired!!"

But to Manoa falls we went as I tried to put on a brave face and smile at my sweet and excited husband.

After we arrived (in the rain, mind you) we headed onto the trail. And for the first 20 minutes I felt a little sheepish. The cloudy weather kept the trail cool and it was incredibly gorgeous. The trail was pretty flat and I stopped now and then to take pictures of all the pretty scenes.

And then things started getting steeper and muddier. And about 3/4 of the way up I was curising Dan and his hike. I was convinced someone was going to the hospital today with a broken something or other.

Then I had an epiphany. Hiking to me was like Christmas shopping to Dan. There are some fun elements. So many things that sound festive and delightful - like sales, hot cocoa and Christmas music. All the things I love about Christmas shopping that Dan could, in theory, appreciate. But the most prevalent thing to him about it is the traffic, and the lines and the parking lot full of crazies.

Hiking is in theory, a fun thing to do. I can say I am glad that I went. It was beautiful. There is so much of me that wants to enjoy it. The sights were incredible and I was able to see beauty that most people dream of. But really, I was wet and muddy and got bug bites.

But in the end, it was a fun family adventure. Not everyday can be Christmas shopping day. And who doesn't smile when muddly little Brady looks up at you and says, "This is the best adventure I've ever been on!"

Much Aloha

2010-11-24T18:57:00.000-08:00

As the days of our time in Hawaii are dwindling...quickly may I add...I have been taking alot of time to think back about life 2 years ago. I felt so angry and so resentful when we received orders to leave California and head off over the ocean so far from family. It would be nice if I could say it happened gracefully, with a sense of adventure that I've seen in other families. But no, with a smirk and mild blushing I will admit that there was a great deal of foot stomping, kicking and screaming (and that doesn't include the children).

Dan was excited and itching for the adventure. The only thing I could see in front of me was 2 long years, so far from home. We had been "homesteading" in San Diego for so long the Navy adventure had been completely drained out of me. It's amazing how one can forget that they are a military family and be so shocked and dismayed at the idea of moving.

My temper tantrum lasted for a long time. God bless my poor husband. The 4 months leading up to our move was a lot of whining and complaining, followed by another several months of sulking. In Hawaii. Can you imagine?

Those of you who cannot imagine, Hawaii is a gorgeous, wonderful place. Living here is a HUGE transition. Although it is part of the USA, there are so many things about it that make you feel like you are in a different country. It took me a while to adjust - the culture shock, missing the family, the always the same weather!

And here we are, only 3 months left in Hawaii (a time I counted the days for!!) and I am feeling nostalgic and sad. We live down the street from one of the most gorgeous beaches in the entire world. My kids have not worn real shoes in over a year. I've eaten amazing food, seen dozens of waterfalls at a time and seen gorgeous sunsets.

But I think the 2 most valuable ah-ha moments of all that I am leaving Hawaii with are these...

1. My family - the 5 of us - are a family all on our own. And although we have a very tight extended family that we will always miss, always love, always want to be with, just us 5 are enough. My husband and kids are enough to sustain me, make me happy and enough - MORE than enough to make every moment special.

2. We are in the Navy. We have opportunities at our fingertips that most people dream of as they sit at their 9-5 job wasting away hours and years doing the same thing. And though it is human nature, I think, to hunker down in the things that you know (your job, your hometown etc) adventure is found in embracing a life of change.

So even though we are returning to California...I am doing so with a temporary mentality. We will love every minute of being close to family and enjoying the big city life. But we are looking to the future already and planning what kind of shenanigans can we get into next? With fingers crossed, and knees to the ground as we seek God's plan...we're hoping for an adventure.

We'll see what happens.

Mahalo nui loa, Hawaii, You have taught me some valuable lessons and will always remember our time here with much Aloha.

Letters to Santa

2010-11-21T19:11:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,

How are you doing there? Are you having fun there? We are going to send cookies and carrots there.

Can I please get Cruncher for Christmas? I would like a new trampoline but it is a little bit smaller than bigger. Can I please get a new Hulk play-doh game because the play-doh went nasty. Can I please get some Spidermans, I don’t really have that much now because I lost some. Can I please get a stuffed animal Linus? Can I please get a Donkey Kong Wii game? There are these octopuses that help you and if you go in the drain you have to be Diddy Kong. I want pajamas – Red Spiderman except it’s a little bit bigger. And I want a DS....maybe....if Mommy says yes. Can I please get some markers? I would like a Spiderman helmet and a honker. And I really want more but I can’t remember what it’s named. I want a Game Stop card. And I want some more sheets. Iron man kind and Hulk. Ooh! And Venom kind, but it’s not the black Spiderman. I would like some tools, play ones. I don’t got my own. I want a Luigi plastic toy, and Toad, and a Mario. And I want a new Mario Kart game.

Thank you, Santa!

Love,
Vincent

Dear Santa,

I just want to tell you my list. I want a game. I want a Super Paper Mario game. I want more games. I want a Super Mario Galaxy. Because Vincent always be’s Mario. My Super Mario 2 can be Vincent’s. I want some toys. I want some Cars toys. And Mario brothers toys. I want Dragon Lightning, I never buyed him. That’s all.

Thank you Santa.

Love,
Brady

Zuppa Toscana

2010-06-06T13:53:00.000-07:00

I am a huge fan of Olive Garden. I don't get to go very often, but I love their soup and salad. MMMM.... I don't usually order Zuppa Toscana but my friend invited me over the other night and she made Olive Garden's recipe. I am now a forever fan. I loved her twist on it WAY more. Enjoy!

Makes: 6-8 servings
INGREDIENTS
• 1 lb ground Italian sausage (you can use sweet basil sausage)
• 1½ tsp crushed red peppers (you can omit if you don't like spice)
• 1 large diced white onion
• 4 Tbsp bacon pieces (real bacon bits work great! not mushy)
• 2 tsp garlic puree
• 10 cups water
• 5 cubes of chicken bouillon
• 1 cup heavy cream
• 1 lb sliced Russet potatoes, or about 3 large potatoes
• ¼ of a bunch of kale

1. Sautee Italian sausage and crushed red pepper in pot. Drain excess fat, refrigerate while you prepare other ingredients.

2. In the same pan, sautee bacon, onions and garlic for approxiamtly 15 mins. or until the onions are soft.

3. Mix together the chicken bouillon and water, then add it to the onions, bacon and garlic. Cook until boiling.

4. Add potatoes and cook until soft, about half an hour.

5. Add heavy cream and cook until thoughouly heated.

6. Stir in the sausage.

7. Add kale just before serving. Delicious!

Accusers Vs. Apologizers

2010-04-25T18:49:00.000-07:00

On the playground you can find 2 different types of parents, usually. The apologizers and the accusers. 99% of the time I think first time parents land in category #2. Only children are very rarely to blame for anything. Those children are perfect and have never been naughty a day in their life. Not when they spit on your 2 year old, or bit your leg when caught them peeing in the corner. Nope.

Accuser parents are the ones that in any given situation will blame any other possible child within a semi reasonable distance. If their child HAS undeniably misbehaved it was because of something YOUR child did.

Apologizers, like me, are the parents who are just going to bend over and take it. Our first reaction tends to be, someone is crying, what did my kid do to cause it? Often these are parents of "strong willed" kids. Because chances are, our kids WERE involved in some way. And when someone blames one of our kids, we tend to take it at face value. Or if you are like me, you just smile and apologize and walk away feeling bitter that your kids was blamed...again.

What makes it so hard to stand up for our kids?? I think people like me, with "unique" kids feel so inadequate as parents at times, it feels wrong or unreasonable to stand up for them. It's so easy to blame kids like that. A pattern is set - these kids are bad news and can be the easy target.

It is amazing how quick a mother can become protective, even violent when a child's physical safety is jeopardy. Why do we let these little battles that eventually add up to a lifetime of hurt, just pass us by. A while ago it came to my attention, that my kids have an apologist mother. And it isn't fair to them. They don't need an accuser mother either. They need an advocate.

And I am working hard at not falling over myself with apologies about their behavior - which is often unruly or in need of correction. But instead, I am working on explaining the situation at hand. (Especially with Vincent) And then not apologizing for his behavior, but trying to see how we can change the matter. I'm not saying I don't make them apologize. It's just that seems to be my go to response. And why is that? They ARE good kids. Wild, creative, spicy, loud, funny, rambunctious kids. I don't want to make excuses for them. But sometimes, they need to be defended. They need to know that no matter what, mommy has their back. (Even if they don't always have mine and might actually jump on it when I am not looking).

GingersMom - the eternal work in progress.

Does he Know?

2010-04-12T17:18:00.000-07:00

I doubt it.

So here I am on this 30 Day Encouragement Challenge. It's rough ladies. I don't think you will ever know how quick you are to nag your husband until you try this. DANGIT. Those little snarky commments just come rip roaring out before you can grab them and stuff them back down your throat.

But it has been a learning experience for me. My husband is awesome. And I am lucky to have him. And although I may be failing completely at this challenge, it has me headed in the right direction at least.

I wonder if he has noticed or has figured out that I am doing this? We'll see. Maybe him not noticing is a good thing and it means I am stellar, wife of the year matierial after all??? Hmmm....

Don't forget to check it out.

Begrudgingly In....

2010-04-05T11:44:00.000-07:00

Recently my dear friend, D challenged me to do this 30 Encouragement Challenge. I have had this one chasing me for years and have managed to evade it until now. I have been confronted head on, and this time I am up for the challenge. Today is day 1 for me. And I am pretty sure I have blown it already at 8:45 am. But back up on the horse I shall go... Are you up for the challenge?

http://30dayhusbandchallenge.blogspot.com/

Apparently, your husband and marriage will thank you. If you are in, let me know and we will try to encourage one another. (And for ONCE - not bitch about it.) And since you won't be so busy nagging and haranguing - check out these links for some yummmer recipes! Di's Daily Dish or Yummies

A Tired Mother's Prayer

2010-04-04T22:44:00.001-07:00

Now I lay me down to sleep,

I pray my sanity to keep.

For if some peace I do not find,

I'm pretty sure I'll lose my mind.

I pray I find a little quiet,

Far from the daily family riot.

May I lie back and not have to think

About what they're stuffing down the sink,

Or who they're with, or where they're at

And what they're doing to the cat.

I pray for time all to myself

(did something just fall off a shelf?)

To cuddle in my nice, soft bed

(Oh no, another goldfish--dead!)

Some silent moments for goodness sake

(Did I just hear a window break?)

And that I need not cook or clean

(well, I've got the right to dream)

Yes now I lay me down to sleep,

I pray my wits about me keep,

But as I look around I know,

I must have lost them long ago!

Randoms

2010-03-30T18:44:00.000-07:00

We spent the weekend trying to survive Pukefest 2010 in the Ginger household. We tried to take out the entire neighborhood with our creepy crud - and managed a couple friends. But since we have no neighbors and live a deserted GHETTO we only reached out and touched a few. Poor Boo spent his 4th birthday in the ER. Nothing says happy birthday like squirting out both ends.

Today Savannah came home from school with a tummy ache. Mean heartless mommy that I am, told the assistant nurse that I thought she was faking it. She did not seem amused. So I went to get the little faker from school who had plastered the obligitory sad sad sicky pout on her face. The head nurse was in the office by then. She nodded at me with a knowing look on her face. She's got Red's number. "I didn't call you." We have an understanding. "Oh I know..." I said. Here at home she is delightfully skipping around and singing. Another point for team Red.

On another note, she decided to take a bath. With tons and tons of bubbles. I walked by and she had covered her head and face with bubbles to look grey haired and bearded. She shouted out as I walked by, "I am George Washington's Wife!" I am sure Martha is looking down on us and appreciating us so so very much.

Spring Break

2010-03-19T19:10:00.000-07:00

Dear Elementary School,

Please take my children back. My sanity is dangling by a very thin thread. The children have sprouted devil horns and their heads are spinning full around. It has become quite clear to me that exposure to me, their mother, is one that only breeds pure evil. Please take them back so I can delight in them in the after school hours when they are tired from working all day and only mildly capable of overthrowing any semblance of control that I have over them.

Most sincerely,

Gingers Mom

And may I declare it with great joy that I am reminded that I am NOT called to homeschool. Foolish Gingers Mom for ever giving that a moment of consideration. And now let us rejoice that Spring Break is almost over. Do you hear the angels singing? I do believe the sun is shining, the birds chirping and the flowers blooming as all things praise God for the return of school....

Until the end of May.

Red-Isms

2010-03-13T16:23:00.000-08:00

My parents visited us from the mainland. And...shocker...Dan spent most of their 2 weeks here traveling or out to sea etc. So for much of their visit they slept in my room and I roomied up with Red. She was sleeping in a sleeping bag on the floor and me in her bed. As we were getting ready for bed one night, I offered to sleep on the couch in the living room so Red could have her own bed.

"No mom, you need to know what it is like to not have a TV in your room."

Does CPS remove children from homes for such deprivation?

____________________________________________________________________________

GingersMom: Red, if you get any more beautiful the boys are gonna come after you and you'll have to beat them off with sticks.

Red: YES!!!!

GingersMom: Yes to the boys a'comin or yes to the sticks?

Red: Both!!!

_____________________________________________________________________________

Yesterday I was sitting mindlessly like tub of jello (As per usual), the kids outside playing when I heard Savannah shouting:

LINUS IS HAVING BABIES!!! LOOK HE'S HAVING A BABY!

One might become alarmed to learn their neutered male dog is giving birth. However, as one wise friend once told me...denial is key. The best parenting advice ever...just pretend it's not happening.

Stuff That Makes Me Angry

2010-03-12T10:39:00.000-08:00

My mom told me the other day that I am like a little mean dog. (Yep...my own mother) Without provocation I will just turn on people, shaking and growling...but pretty much fairly harmless. My base line, you could say, is a "Screw you" mood. Is there something wrong with that?

Everyone has pet peeves. Probably more than I do, but I am honest about them. I may be mocked and ridiculed for my outlandish fears, peeves, ideas. But you know you are all just as bad as I am. So, to share a few more weirdo things about myself...as if I haven't shared enough to make you all go running for the hills....

1.   It infuriates me when people put ribbons on their car (like the yellow ribbons representing our troops) that say random BS like "I love my labs!" or "Play more video games!" Yes. I have acutally seen these ribbons. (even here, living on base)
Why stop there..... Why not a yellow ribbon announcing "I have chronic diarhea!"? Or, "Gingers, find a cure"?
You are talking about our troops dying for your freedom, people. Do you really think taking a symbol that represents your support for heros can really be translated into a symbol announcing your love for your poodle. Really?    Personally, I see a solid basis for that one. But I need to climb up on my soapbox here and rant about it for a while. I think I'm done...for now.

2.   The other day I went to go see a movie with my parents. (I sat between them because I don't like strangers. Strangers in my near proximity anger me too...but that's normal, right?) There was a man sitting in front of me and slightly to the side. I took an instant disliking to him. Not only did he have an earring with that was more flashy than what I would wear, but he was balding. (Now before you start throwing rocks at me...Balding is Not in itself a problem, of course. In fact, I think a lot of balding men can be kinda sexy if they style it the right way... )
This guy. Not so much. He was in full blown denial mode. He was bald on top, except for some hairs around his natural hair line. So instead of buzzing it, he grew out the front bang section (a few scraggly hairs) and used gel to spike them up. Surrounded by the rest of his shiny baldness. It looked like he was wearing a tiara. It took all my self control to not throw popcorn at him. **insert small dog shaking piss-offedness here**

3.   Men in skinny jeans. Need I say more?

4. Women in the public bathroom. Now I realize that not all women are speed pee-ers like me. I pride myself in my ability to get in and out in record time. Except of course when I am alone in there with 3 kids. Much smacking, screaming, tattling, threatening, and a lot of "Pull up your pants!!" and "Aim that at the toilet!!" But Good GOD! What do other women DO in there? How many times have you been in a public bathroom with 5+ stalls and waited SEVERAL minutes before someone comes out. I'm beginning to wonder if public toilets vibrate, and I just haven't figured it out.... But until then people, get on with yer bizness in there and get out!

Those are a few that have come to mind. The truth is, you just never can predict when the moment will strike. But if you see me in a corner looking pissy...chances are someone in the room is wearing socks with capri pants.

Spotlight on a Good Read

2010-03-01T18:15:00.000-08:00

One of my dear friends from college (just last year, mind you since I am only 21 again...ahem) has a fascinating and entertaining blog called A Girl and Her Books. It's about alot of things, almost all sarcastic and to my delight, somewhat mocking...but also mainly wonderful literarly insight.

This week she has written a post about Lewis Caroll, the author of Alice in Wonderland. She awaits the movie with great excitement as many of you are I am sure.

I left her a comment that I will share with you as well. Do you plan to see the movie?

Unless my daughter binds and gags me and drags me kicking and screaming, I will not be seeing the movie. The mere commercials give me the heebie geebies. I will have nightmares for months, I can tell. The creepiness lands in the range somehere between that of the Burger King “King” character and and the bizarre, frightful nature of mayonaise. Shudder…..

Does anyone else get chilled to the bone at the commercials?

Then again, does anyone else have nightmares about Birds of Paradise? Just me?

Moms and Women

2010-02-21T21:54:00.000-08:00

This was a fantastic article sent to me by a friend. You may just pass it over but it is worth a read.

Is it just stress, or could you be a woman struggling with undiagnosed Attention Deficit Disorder?

Most of us are familiar with hyperactivity and attentional problems in kids, and the debate over whether Ritalin is being over-prescribed. You may have also read an article here or there about ADHD in adults. John Ratey and Ned Hallowell's book on ADHD, Driven to Distraction, made its way to the New York Times best seller's list. But chances are that you haven't read much about girls or women with ADHD. Why not? Because ADHD has long been considered a male problem that affects only a few girls and women.

What are the signs of ADHD in women? ADHD in females can often be masked. Women with ADHD are most often diagnosed as depressed. And many women with ADHD do struggle with depression; however that is only part of the picture. As Sari Solden, author of Women with Attention Deficit Disorder, describes it, ADHD in women is the disorder of dis-order. In other words, for most women with ADHD their lives are filled with disorder which can feel overwhelming - piles and clutter out of control. There are some women with ADHD who have successfully compensated for their ADhD, but the price they pay is to expend most of their waking energy combating their natural tendency to be disorganized. Many women with ADHD feel a powerful sense of shame and inadequacy. They feel constantly behind, overwhelmed and frazzled. Some women with ADHD feel that their lives are so out of control that they rarely invite others into their home - too ashamed to allow anyone to see the disorder, too overwhelmed to combat the disorder that pervades their lives.

ADHD can be mild, moderate or severe. Some women are able to cope with the demands of daily life until they become a mother. For other women, their coping abilities don't collapse until baby number two comes along. The job of housewife and mother is especially difficult for women with ADHD because of its very nature. To raise children and to run a household well we are required to function in multiple roles at the same time, to cope with constant, unpredictable interruptions, to function with little structure, little support or encouragement, and to not only keep ourselves on track, but also be the scheduler of everyone else in the family. Who has soccer practice? Who has a dentist appointment? Who needs new shoes? Who needs a permission slip signed? Where is the permission slip? Who needs to go to the library? Who needs us to drop everything this minute because they skinned their knee or because they have an ear ache and want to come home from school? And in the midst of all this we are supposed to keep on track, planning meals, doing housework, laundry, planning social events, and, for the majority of mothers, working full time.

ADHD has become a more challenging problem for women as the demands in our late twentieth century lifestyles become greater and greater. Now we are expected to juggle homemaking, child care and full time employment, along with a full complement of extra-curricular activities for our children. What is highly stressful for a woman without ADhD, becomes a continuing crisis for a woman with ADhD. These women frequently suffer from anxiety, depression and low self-esteem because they find they can't live up to the superwoman image that so many women attempt today.

What is the difference between ADHD and stress? Stress is temporary or cyclical. A woman who feels disorganized and overwhelmed due to stress will heave a huge sigh of relief when the holidays are over or when the crunch at work has passed, and will set about returning her life to order. For a woman with ADhD, the stressful times are bad, but even in the best of times there is a feeling that the wave of "to do's" is about to crash over her head.

You may have ADHD if you: Have trouble completing projects and jump from one activity to another. Parents and teachers told you that you should have tried harder in school. And are frequently forgetful; have trouble remembering to do the things you intended. Frequently rushing, over-committed, often late. Make impulsive purchases, impulsive decisions. Feel overwhelmed and disorganized in your daily life. Have a disorderly purse, car, closet, household, etc. Are easily distracted from the task you are doing. Go off on tangents in conversations; may tend to interrupt. Have trouble balancing your checkbook; difficulty with paperwork.

Having difficulty with one or two of these things doesn't mean you have ADHD. This list isn't meant as a questionnaire for self-diagnosis; but if you find yourself answering "yes" to many of the questions listed above, it may be very helpful to seek an evaluation from a professional very experienced in diagnosing ADHD in adults. (A good place to begin your hunt for such a professional is to call the child ADHD experts in your community.)

If you are an undiagnosed woman with ADHD, help could be just around the corner. Women who have blamed themselves for years as lazy or incompetent have received help, through ADHD-oriented psychotherapy, medication and ADHD coaching and are now feeling and functioning much better.

Salvation Petition

2010-02-16T16:13:00.000-08:00

We have made a place for earnest believers in Christ to openly declare their commitment to our Savior, Jesus Christ. Feel free to sign our petition at http://www.dod4god.com/ and join us in moving our nation back to One Nation Under God. One new decision will bring about renewed action that can eventually show that Jesus is alive and on the move in our land.

An oldie but goodie for Valentines Day

2010-02-13T23:08:00.000-08:00

This is an old post, but fitting for V-Day. (That's Valentines Day, not Vasectomy day. But that was a day to celebrate too!)

Frankly, there are no other men I loved before other than my husband. Ok, ok so you are rolling your eyes right now, but I have to be honest, Dan is the ONLY man I was ever in love with. After reading this you may understand why and applaud me for jumping at the chance to marry Dan.

1. My very first date was with this very handsome guy named Bryan. He was 19 and I was 16. He met my horrible and intimidating brothers and never called again.

2. Boyfriend #1 was a friend of Dan's - who I dated AFTER dating Dan in highschool. Big mistake. Most people believe he is likely to be the next unibomber - either than or will turn into my gay neighbor Larry. My brothers hated him because he did not own 1 single pair of pants - when he went to the desert in the winter to visit his dad in prison, he had to borrow his little sister's pants.

3. Boyfriend #2 Jeff. A decent guy but we were an odd mix. I was the prim and proper pastor's daughter who loved to wear pink. He had long hair and wore torn Metallica tee shirts everywhere - including church. He barely graduated highschool and had no plans for the future - very unlike my goal oriented self, but I adored him anyway. My brothers hate HIM because they swore they saw him wear bicycle shorts one day - an unforgivable crime.

4. Boyfriend #3 Kent. He was my first serious boyfriend in college. He cried about everything. We went to go see A Walk In the Clouds on our first date and did not cry - he SOBBED. Then he looked over at me and said, "you're not crying?". He cried over everything - especially wheat fields.(He was from Montana and missed them so bad....ick) Does he need more of a reason for my brothers to hate him?

5. Boyfriend #4 Todd aka Comb Over Guy. Yes, he had a comb over. He was 24 at the time. He was also very short. I have no idea why I dated him. He had just broken up with a girl who was gorgeous. He told me I was not nearly as pretty. How is it short ugly guys get such great women? My brothers hated him purely for his comb over.

This was all before the time I was 20 years old and I was disillusioned to the world of men. And then...

6. Dan. My brothers like him. So I married him.

Creative Spelling

2010-02-12T16:41:00.000-08:00

Vincent is in Kindergarten. They have a way of teaching them to write now called "Creative spelling". It involves just writing down the letters you hear. A "wing it" approach.

It is cute and I actually like it. It makes for fun letters to Grandma and Poppa. "I lv you. Cm c me soon." etc.

Dan, love of my life, has his own version of creative spelling.

Vincent and Brady are both big into learning how things are spelled. So, now they ask us to give them words so they can try to spell it out.

The other day we were in the car on the way home (from church, mind you).

Dan: How do you spell "Assume"?

Kids: A...S....uh.... (much giggling from Dan)

Dan: How do you spell "Ship"?

Kids: S....h....i....(more giggling)

And his favorite of all

Dan: Spell "Country"

Kids: C.....u....n....t....r...y

He almost had to pull the car over for this one.

Only daddies get such satisfaction from having their kids sound out naughty words.

Much eye rolling by Gingers Mom.....

Blessed

2010-02-10T17:42:00.000-08:00

My good friend passed away yesterday. She was married to a wonderful Navy man who just returned from a 7 month long deployment. They were incredibly in love after 18 years of marriage. She has 2 boys, ages 18 and 15. They adore her. On an average Friday night, they wanted to spend it at home with their parents.

I can only hope that my kids get a lifetime with me, and that when they are teenagers, when they have free time, they will want to spend it with me.

Her name was Andrea. And she was beatiful. And hilarious. And courageous. And she taught be alot about being a wife in the Navy.

Another friend of mine described them like this: "He looks like Superman and his wife is smokin hot." They had everything. And now their grief is overwhelming, palpable.

I am looking at my kids and my heart is aching.

My husband came home last night and I just wanted to take off all my clothes and get in bed with him. Not even to have sex...but I just couldn't get close enough. Those moments seem so desperate. I cannot think of words to express how much my family means to me. They are my world.

I hope tonight, you climb in bed with your loved one and make sure they know what they are to you.

The Butt

2010-02-08T21:13:00.000-08:00

Last week I took my kids to the Children's Discovery Center. This was a moderate attempt at finding something educational and fun to fill in one of the many many days off school here in Hawaii. The kids haven't had a full school week since October thanks to "Furlough Friday". So, in an attempt to avoid complete parenting failure, I have decided to seek out learning experiences. (Unlike the last many months of Wii Fridays.)

So off we go to the Honolulu Children's Discovery Center.

There are tons of fun things to do there. Play rooms where you can pretend you are grocery shopping, change the oil in your car, play dress up... And then there is the body science room. You can see how your heart pumps blood, assemble a brain puzzle and even wind your way through the digestive system.

That's right folks! You can take a stroll through a giant intestine and slip down the anal slide.

My kids thought this was absolute bliss.

There were many screams of "I'm in the butt! I'm in the butt!"

Is it just me that would think all children yell this out? Why then, oh why, were the only children screaming, "I'm poop, in the BUTT" ....MINE?

It was a fun day all in all. We learned alot. Although I was tempted to teach the kids a thing about hemorrhoids... Obviously THIS butt, has not see childbirth.... But I refrained.

When Daddy got home, he was very impressed to hear from Brady. "Mommy took us to the big Butt. Daddy, did you go in the butt?"

It's wrong. So wrong.

Waving the Big Fat White Flag

2010-01-28T22:14:00.001-08:00

It's that time again. Fatty season is in full force. I have rebelled against the system. Given my middle finger to the typical New Year's Resolutions. But now, I must admit defeat and begin.....dieting. (Can you hear my deep sigh, and see my shoulders slumping?)

South Beach...here we go again.

And if we are lucky you will hear glorious tales of skinny me romping the shores of Hawaii in a skimpy bikini. (Apparently I am hoping my stretch marks will miraculously disappear with all the chub)

But most likely, and this is a fair warning, I will be bitching about it for many weeks to come. So when I am on here screaming and whining and begging you all to have mercy and mail me some chocolate....please talk me down.

Perhaps you should threaten to leave me nasty comments beginning with, Dear Lard Ass.... if I don't start exercising.

Ok, February...here I come. But DAMMIT! I am going to have some cake on my birthday in a few weeks. But by then I am sure I will have lost at least 30 lbs. Right?

Amusement at your fingertips.

2010-01-27T17:27:00.000-08:00

I have been told several times lately how "crazy" I am. That I always have something funny to say on Facebook or that I am constantly making fun of something etc etc. At first I patted myself on the shoulder...proud that I am such a funny funny gal.

But then I thought about this a little deeper. Um...does that mean I am just silly and/or irreverent? Or are they trying to say I have a side splitting HILARIOUS sense of humor?

I guess I have come to the conclusion that 1. Yes I am awesomely entertaining and funny. 2. Yes. I am irreverent. To alot of things.

I do get a sick satisfaction for putting toilet paper "under". It wracks me with the giggles to see how furious that makes people. My hair, is currently streaked with blue. It is awesome. I love it partially because of said awesomeness. I love it because my kids think I am the coolest mom ever. And equally, I love it because I get another round of sick satisfaction when I walk uptight people and hear the whispers.

Dan and I were talking the other day and we decided that we are the funniest people ever. Maybe not to anyone else. But we crack ourselves up everyday. We will point at ourselves and laugh, point at our kids and laugh...and MOST certainly we WILL be pointing at YOU and laugh.

Do people really want it any other way?

Life is so bumpy, so messy, so stressy. (Heehee...I like that I just rhymed) Why can't we look at all that mess and laugh at it. Why can't we fly on an airplane next to Bob and laugh about it for years to come? Why can't we look at a kitchen table covered in Vagisil and and blog happy blogs about it? And while people are judgy wudgy at us about having such a good time, why can't we make fun of them when they aren't looking?

Happy giggles to ya!

***EDIT: I realized that after I published this that the title sounds dirty. That made me laugh too. ***

Eat it....eat it...eat it...

2010-01-21T21:55:00.000-08:00

Last weekend my husband flew me to San Diego. It was either that or one of our other family members was going to get voted off the island. So they chose me, since I was a grouchy puss. So I got some much needed non-mommy time logged in.

I have come to the realization that I attract freaks. Especially when I travel. Particularly when I travel alone.

This trip, I sat next to weirdo extraordinaire. We'll call him Bob. I'm not sure why, except I can't remember his name and the name Bob amuses me. No...I don't know why.

I am a claustrophobic freak. So I get online early and reserve myself an aisle seat so that I can maintain my sanity while hurtling through the air at light speed in a metal tube. (Yes...I know it isn't light speed, but I don't know how fast it goes so geez...give me a break) Bob decided that I need a window seat and kept pestering me to change places with him. He was good natured enough and finally just told me he pees alot. Ok. Then says, "Your dad is my age. He has the same problem." How he has obtained that tidbit of personal information by just looking at me I found most intriguing.

Bob then takes the opportunity to tell me that his wife could not make the trip so he plans on consuming "alot" of beers. So when the beverage cart goes by, he proceeds to order THREE at once. And yes...they served it to him. I ordered a diet coke. Bob found this in poor taste, leaned over me and told the attendant that no....I would like a margarita. I was too dumbfounded and frankly, amused, to say anything. But, alas, they did not have margaritas. So I got my diet coke. Bob pouted. He told me diet coke was boring and sulked into his beer.

Then we were served lunch. I am always suspicious about airplane food. So I off handedly mentioned I was just gonna eat the brownie. Bob was delighted and offered me his brownie in exchange for my enchilada. That works for me.

This is when Bob decides that if we run out of chocolate and beer we shall then "skip up and down the plane holding hands" until they give us more. I just wink at him. Sure, Bob. Sure.

"You are so much more fun than my WIFE!" Bob yelled. Big sigh.... "My wife would never skip around an airplane holding hands with me."

So Bob happily munches down his enchiladas as I nibble on my own brownie. When I am done, he plops down his brownie as well with a big old sloppy grin on his face. So proud to have a worthy offering for me. I smiled, and pushed it to the side for later. Bob glared at the brownie...back at me...at the brownie.

"Eat it!" He proclaimed.

I tried to tell him that I just ate one and even I, president of Chocoholics Anonymous, need to pace myself. Bob was not impressed.

"Eat it"

"I'm good, Bob. Really."

"Eat it."

"I will Bob, in a little bit."

"Eat it....eat it....eat it...."

After about five minutes of trying to explain to Bob why I would wait for a while. I ate the damn brownie.

The flight was pretty calm after that. Except for the fact that I became increasingly alarmed as he downed a total of SEVEN beers during the flight. At which point he became very affectionate, patting my leg and kissing my hand. It was bad enough that I had to start planning at which point I would have to actually punch him in the face. But he was able to keep his hands to himself enough for me to refrain.

But at least, he was great entertainment and made the time fly by. I'm sure he will be very disappointed when he sits next to someone on his flight back who will inform him that no...they will not skip. Poor Bob.

Stuff Not About Naked Barbie

2010-01-12T21:40:00.000-08:00

I have 2 boys. They are awesome in many many remarkable ways. As of late, my little one impresses me most with a particular skill. Cockroach killer.

Brady is 3 and the best cockroach killer around. He has a masterful approach and technique.

I'm not exactly sure why, but it requires Vincent's shoes...knee and elbow pads...and a helmet. Then he will proudly puff out his chest, saunter over to me and pat me on the shoulder. With a pitying look on his face he says....

"It's ok mommy....I kill the cockarochies."

I feel so safe and proud as charges out into the dangers of the patio to save me from the world's evils. My hero.

____________________________________________

Vincent is 5. He is afraid of girls. Now when I ask him if he wants to go on a date with Mommy he freaks out and says he is scared. Terrified he will be asked to "kiss" at the end of the date. God forbid. This is the same child that will cry hysterically if I forget to hug and kiss him goodnight.

A few weeks ago we took the kids to see Princess and the Frog with a few other neighborhood kids. One was an adorable blond, blue eyed 5 year old girl named Kate. As we were walking through the mall after the movie, Kate looks at Vincent with quiet determination and grabs his hand. My poor, sweet, pale skinned Vincent turned red over his entire body. Walking ahead of me I noticed his elbows, the backs of his legs, his WHOLE body was flushed with embarrassment. He looked back at me desperately and stretched out his other clammy pink hand and reached for me. It was hard...so so hard...not to point and laugh at him. (Yes. I realize that makes me a bad mother.) But I attempted a very thinly veiled look of sympathy. Then he finally grabbed my hand and said "Mommy! I'm scared!"

And so it begins, son.

Kate had a scowl on her face at this point and tugs on Vincent's other hand. "Vincent...don't you go trying to hold your mommy's hand!"

Can't blame a girl there. I did have mercy on him and held on tight to his sweaty little fingers in a stand of solidarity. Momma's got your back. No worries. As long as we aren't having this issue in 15 years from now, I think we'll be ok.

While I am Thinking About Barbie....

2010-01-10T14:43:00.000-08:00

Dear Mattel,

I have to write to you to tell you how much your classic, all time favorite toy, Barbie..... has meant to me. Not only is she hours and hours of fun for our daughter, but I have learned more than I ever thought possible from this magical doll. She truly is an inspiration.

Who knew the human form could be positioned in so many unique fashions when nekkid? One is always in for a fun filled Friday night frolic when you clean up the playroom and find Barbie laid out in a creative pose you have not seen or considered before!

So, I am writing this to pitch a book option for you.

Barbie's Kama Sutra...Educational AND Fun!

I am posting a few pictures so the image can really penetrate. (snicker)

Be comfortable with your body!

Don't be afraid to be yourself!

For the advanced and adventurous and deviants!

Fun with fetishes!

For just $17.95 who wouldn't jump at the chance? In the meantime, us stay at home moms will just be peaking in on the Barbie corner in our kids rooms to brush up on our techniques.

Mahalo,

GingersMom

And So We Wander....

2010-01-08T17:53:00.000-08:00

When as a mother, you get a moment to stop. Sit. Have a cup of coffee. And listen to....silence.

(Yeah right...)

No really. We get that now and then don't we? Kids at school, napping? If not, proceed to kitchen for frying pan and go beat on the man that impregnated you. Right now.

Ok, so here you are enjoying the silence. Some people use this opportunity to clean. (Ick) Watch TV, read...ok. Exercise (double, triple ICK) Me? I wander. In my mind...wander off. I'm sure other people do it. It can't just be me. But my mind truly is a Wonderland of things to discover and contemplate.

Sometimes I have deep meaningful thoughts and conversations in my head. But mostly...mostly...it goes something like this.

Ah...it's quiet in here. Bliss!
I should pick up those toys....nah.
Why is that Barbie staring at me?
Why is it naked?
Why is it always always naked?
I remember when my boobs were perky like that.
Why does my husband always grab my boobs when the kids "aren't looking"?
What does he find so appealing about me bending over the dishwasher?
I should take chicken breasts out of the freezer for dinner.
Last time I made chicken the kids said it smelled like feet.
Why does the boys' room ALWAYS smell like feet?
When is the last time they had a bath?
When is the last time I had a shower?
If I don't shave soon I am going to have to get me some Birkenstocks.
I should add granola to the shopping list.
That Barbie is still staring at me....

Hey, Where Did the Clouds Go?

2010-01-07T15:36:00.000-08:00

My life in the last year has been one adventure after another. The move, experiencing a new place, schools, church, friends, furry roomates in the attic... Lots of big changes. Tearing up those roots in San Diego was laborous, but in predictable fashion, a good step for our family as a whole. Even though the kids were taking bets when my sanity would in fact fizzle out and I would start mumbling jibberish, I managed to hang onto it, even if it is just a shred.

Being in Hawaii has given me the opportunity to evaluate alot of things in my life. To consider what is important to me, to determine what got me where I am and why things are the way that they are. Well... I am HERE because the Navy made me go. But at least it isn't Sedona.

After a long process that is detailed and self indulgent I came to a realization about my life. Particularly my life in regards to Vincent. My unique one. My "spirited" one. My strong willed one. My ADHD one. The one that has me crying "Why God Why?" on a regular basis.

I began a mission to discover why my particular relationship with him was so challenged. What was it about me that was unique to cause all these sparks to fly when we are together? I looked inward and started to explore. Not in a effort to blame myself for the "mistakes" I have made but in a quest for understanding.

I began to research about ADHD and the environments in which kids grow up and what common factors may be involved. Apparently, 60 % of children with ADHD have a parent with ADD. A light bulb went on.

DAN HAS ADHD!

My research became more pinpointed and I started to compile evidence against him to prove it. Look here I have proof that I can blame you for this after all! Now I have more than just stretch marks and saggy boobs to hold against you. I can sit in the corner, giving you the stink eye, remembering my svelt size 6 body and the rational mind I once had.

However, as I read on learning more about this particular "condition" something struck a very familiar chord. Strangely, this did not resemble my husband at all. Stranger still, the description of a grown woman, particularly a mother with ADD could have been written about myself.

Holy Crap! Sorry honey...you can just hand that blame back to me. Oops. Put it right here in my pocket. Thanks...pat pat.....

Dan and I laughed at this for a while and shoved it on a shelf...far...far...away...under a musty blanket.

But something kept leading me back to that shelf. And after several months I became brave enough to peek under that blanket, and explore some more.

It has been a long road, but I have finally come to terms with the fact that I do have ADD. I have consulted many doctors, evaluated their opinions and accepted it. Embraced it even! I am not some underachieving hack, masquerading as an intelligent individual. Perhaps I am in fact an intelligent individual, with unique brain functions who just marches to the beat of a very erratic drum!

And for the first time in my life, I feel....hopeful, happy, optimistic and just downright GOOD. It is amazing when you can look at something with the right perspective. Instead of being hard on myself for being flaky or impatient I can understand WHY I have done the things I have done. Understand WHY I have a difficult time with certain things. Not an excuse...but an understanding that I am wired a little different. And who didn't know that anyway??

And the realization has been so freeing for me. For all you judgers out there (as if I have a vast million followers....Hi mom!) yes I do take medication. Not because I believe all "disorders" must be treated with chemicals, but because it is what is working for me. After a week of said medication, I woke up with a realization. That the night before I had gone to bed, satisfied...telling myself I did a good job as a mother today. And that is a first for me.

This is a good thing for me. I'm anxiously awaiting what might be around the next corner. I guess we'll find out...

They're After Me

2010-01-06T13:54:00.000-08:00

Hawaiian living is not always what it is cracked up to be. Granted....I live across the street from a gorgeous beach. It is a balmy 79 degrees today in January. And I have beautiful hibiscus and plumeria blooming in my yard year round. Bliss....

However, we do have some things that might deter you from this life of non stop pleasure. Perhaps, the giant rats? Rats the size of your overfed cat? Oh yes, my friend. And they live in my attic. Dan was able to convince me for several months that there was actually a cat up there. Ah, to be transported back in time to that lovely place called ignorance...or denial.

Yes, we have rats the size of a toddler living above us. And they are too smart to be trapped. And to top it off, they are now chewing holes in our ceiling. That's right...I said holes in my ceiling.

I am beginning to understand why they are planning to demolish this place in March.

So, if you are interested in a ghetto shack with a glorious view of a Hawaiian beach. You know where to find it.

I'll be the one in the fetal position in the corner with the baseball bat.....

Memories: They're Not What They Used to Be

2009-10-23T11:40:00.001-07:00

Motherhood is not what I expected. I had a great childhood. One of those dreamy little lives that seemed akin the Cleavers. Granted, I have realized that people tend to remember things very different than their parents. I have sweet memories of decorating Christmas cookies with my brothers. My mom remembers the annual Schmidt family brawl. I remember going to my grandparents house for "Grandma-palooza" in the summer while my parents stayed home. I thought that they were so sad missing it all. Little did I know that they were having their own palooza of different kind. We both looked forward to it equally (Ok, let's be honest, they probably looked forward to it more than us) but saw things in very different perspectives.

So each day as I am serving the kids dinner, threatening their lives, giving them a bath, breaking up a fight, tucking them into bed, and teetering on the edge of my sanity as I look down at my wet, tattered, dirty clothes and mussed up hear and the tick in my left eye......I wonder. Are they remembering this the same way? Will they remember amongst all the yelling and discipline and downright mental breakdown of their mother the good things I manage to squeeze in there? Like the extra squirt of bath bubbles I add just to make sure they have enough to share. Or the fact I stayed up an hour late to make sure the right t-shirt they wanted to wear to school the next day made it into the dryer. Or giving them just ONE more cookie because I like they way they smirk when they ask.

Will they eventually turn around and say, "Thanks for not killing me, Mom for...." pouring an entire bottle of strawberry syrup on your new carpet? For running on the driveway in the front yard in your underwear yelling at your brother? For making a trip to the grocery store seem like I needed war paint? For asking the lady in the line at the store if she farted?

I can only hope. Get on my knees every day and pray that the Lord will glaze over the memories and let them remember me as a calm, cool, collected mommy. Ok, so that isn't going to happen. But maybe if I scrape together enough spare change, I can manage to hire a therapist that will convince them one day that hey...Mom wasn't so bad. That is if I am not locked in a padded cell by then.

Strange Hawaiian things #1

2009-05-21T11:33:00.000-07:00

There are a number of things I have observed in Hawaii that has one scratching their head and saying "WTF?"

Red went on a field trip with her first grade class. As usual, I had to sign a permission form. Along with it is a list of instructions.

1. Bring a lunch in a bag that may be thrown out.
2. Be to school ON TIME
3. Footwear is required

Since when is footwear optional? Is this a Hawaiian thing? Can I send my kids to school with no shoes? It would definitely lower my monthly clothing budget for the kids. Especially for Red who destroys her shoes in a single bound. Or she begs begs begs me to buy her a particular pair of shoes. She PROMISES they are comfortable...she will wear them everyday. She simply cannot LIVE...WITHOUT...THESE...SHOES.

Where are the shoes? In the bottom of the closet only worn once before Red had complete toxic meltdown about how they were SO horrible and PAINFUL. And if I make her wear them it will damage her feet for life and she will need crutches to hobble herself to school....maybe even a wheelchair.

So here I am thinking...footwear optional. Not a bad idea.

Dogs v. children

2009-05-18T14:13:00.000-07:00

Don't you just love it when some young new married person tells you they know exactly what you are going thru with your kid because...they have dogs?

You stand there in the middle of Walmart with your hair disheveled, clothes mussed up and a tick in your left eye...(because you have to admit your stupidity here: you came to Walmart with all three of your kids in tow) and dream about the the large blunt object you would like wield upon all the short loud people and then turn on the said idiotic new married person.

Yes. I can see how a little schnauzer could just bring you to your knees.

Dogs chew furniture, pee on the floor, maybe wake you up at night with their whining or scratching. They beg for food, needs baths on occasion and usually have bad smelling gas. Yes. These are all usually true and can be said for most children as well. I can see the similarity.

Talking back, sassing, lies, tattletales, hitting, spitting, stomping of the feet and turning blue in the face these are exactly why parenting is nothing like having a dog.

How many Labradors paint your dining table and chairs with Vagasil? How many chihuahuas squeeze an entire bottle of strawberry syrup on your newly laid living room carpet? How many chow chows yank off their poopy diaper and proceed to paint a lovely Picasso on your wall? When is the last time you saw a golden retriever ask a grocery clerk if they have "itchy itchy crabs"?

A whole world of adventure lies in wait for these young unsuspecting DINKS (double income no kids). I personally would like to pop a giant bowl of popcorn and have a nice glass of chardonnay (let's be honest here...a bottle) and sit back in an easy chair and watch when their first child is born and discovers the wonders of the bathroom medicine chest.

For now, I just smile and say..."Yes honey, dogs and kids are one and the same."

The Cross

2009-03-18T20:04:00.000-07:00

On the way home from preschool the other day, Red picked up an art project that Stinky made that was covered with all different shapes. She was pointing the shapes and colors out:

Red: There's a circle, and a square, and a triangle...and that thing God gets up on, and a rectangle and an oval...

?????

GingersMom: What did you just say?

Red: An oval!

GingersMom: No, this one (pointing at the specified object)

Red: (Rolling her eyes and completely blase) You know... that's the thing that God gets up on. Then he dies for our skins.

My Poor Dusty Blog

2009-03-17T17:50:00.000-07:00

I have not forgotten you, poor mistreated blog. I have just been incredibly overwhelmed and busy that I have barely had time to remember to shower. Snifff...sniff...dangit. Maybe that is why I haven't seen my friends lately... Hmmmmmmm.

We just got word that we have a house on base in Hawaii and we will be leaving good old sunny Cali April 15th. Hubs is already over there enjoying the surf and sun and getting things ready for us. In the meantime the kids are doing their best to conquer and destroy. As my dear friend warned me, when you are military gearing up to PCS (change duty stations) you must change your name to Murphy. Because everything that CAN go wrong WILL go wrong. So far the car has been in the shop 2 times in one week and the dryer broke. They say bad comes in threes so I am hoping it all stops here.... I am going to regret putting that in print...I just know it.

So I am cracking my knuckles and dusting off, good old bloggy blog. I plan to give it another good run. Too much damn ridiculous stuff happens in my life not to record it and amuse myself later on.

Observation

2008-12-09T08:44:00.000-08:00

On an average Tuesday morning, just as expected my privacy was unapologetically disregarded by my two sons. Taking a selfish moment to you know...pee...Stinky and Boo come barging in and demand that I remove myself and let them go to the bathroom.

Boo goes first, Stinky stands back and pouts. Of course.

I sit Boo up on the potty and he claps in complete glee and satisfaction with himself as he pees on the potty. Stinky looks at him and says in a high ptiched baby cooing kind of voice and says:

"Oh, look at his teeny tiny pee pee!!"

I rolled my eyes. "Of course it is little, he's just a baby."

Thinking about it...I added "You know yours is little too." I snickered inside....yes I know that probaby puts me on Santa's naughty list for motherhood but I couldn't help it.

Stinky looks down, puffs out his chest and says in a loud deep voice. "No way...mine is REALLY BIG!!!"

And so the delusions begin. At the age of 4.

Update

2008-11-25T21:36:00.000-08:00

My creative juices have dried up. My children have sucked every semi intelligent and witty thought from my brain and fed it to the dog. At least that is my theory. Either that or those brilliant and pithy ideas have ended up in the same place as all the missing socks.

If anyone happens to know where they can be found, you have hit the jackpot.

My husband does not believe me that the dryer eats the socks. But he is wrong. I know it. I believe that my dryer has gotten tired of cotton socks and has turned carnivorous. It now feasts on my brain as I do endless load of laundry.

Beware. Laundry WILL destroy your brain cells. That is reason enough for me to avoid it.

______________________________________________________________

We are in the process of packing up our house for the big move. We don't leave for Hawaii until March. But we have rented out our house and will be living with my parents for the next 4 months.

My kids are thrilled. It is similar to being told that you will be living at Disneyland. With endless cookies and bowls of candy.

They dream of dinners consisting of nothing but olives and marshmallows.

I am pretty sure that they are disappointed that Dan and I are actually going to be living there too.

We are the destroyers of all joy.

Bound and determined to taint their Grandma and Poppa - palooza.

I fear for our safety. They are going to be evil greedy over sugared monsters by the end. Have pity on me.

The Curse Of Sedona

2008-10-12T08:42:00.000-07:00

WARNING: DISGUSTING STORY LIES AHEAD....

When I graduated high school my parents took me on a vacation to Sedona, AZ before heading off to college. We stayed in a beautiful condo, had a great time together. And then the curse of Sedona hit. My dad stepped off of a sidewalk - walking normally - and broke his foot. We spent hours at the ER exraying, getting a cast and helping hobbling dad into the car.
Next thing you know, the night before leaving Sedona and heading to L.A. for my college orientation. We all come down with the stomach flu. Puking galore. Since I absolutely had to be in LA in 2 days we packed the car - sick and all and headed towards California. In my Toyota Tercel. In 125 degree weather. With no air conditioning. And black vinyl seats. With the stomach flu.

I am still scarred by this memory.

Fast forward 13 years. My dear friend Rachel got married about a week ago and Red was her flower girl. Choice of destination: Sedona. Don't get me wrong. Sedona is gorgeous. The red rock is stunning and something worth seeing. Unless you have been touched with the Curse.

On the drive out (I carpooled with my kids and my parents) we stopped un Yuma for Dairy Queen. DQ - a road trip MUST, yeah for Dilly Bars. As we are standing in line I notice that Boo has spit up. So I started to walk towards the bathroom to clean it up. When he does it again. By the time we get into the bathroom he has become the Exorcist baby. It is everywhere. I am not exaggerating when I say EVERY surface of the bathroom is covered. The floor, the walls, the toilet, the sink, my entire body and his. Even our shoes. It was bad my friends.

My mom popped her head in to check on us and was horrified. The Curse....

After that we had a pretty quiet vacation. We swam, saw a movie, celebrated Red's 6th birthday, enjoyed the wedding. Until the last day of our trip. It hits.

Vincent wakes up puking. Then Brady gets it too (again). We decided to stay an extra day so that we could avoid car vomit. But who should start the whole thing again on the drive home? Red.

I have seen more puke in the last week to last me a life time. At least we made it back with no broken bones. But Sedona is on my list of places NEVER to step foot in again.

Dear Sedona: Message received.

Life is a Tornado

2008-09-02T10:51:00.000-07:00

Life as of late has been a wild, massive tornado. Everywhere I look there is twisting, turning, nauseating change and turmoil.

Some of the changes are good. Red has started first grade. Woot woot! Yeah for school!!! Stinky is in a new class at Preschool and is rocking it. His teachers actually seek us out to tell us how well behaved he has been. Never had THAT happen before.

The latest big shock wave is that we received our orders FINALLY. And we are moving to Hawaii. Go ahead...be jealous. Let the envy wash over you.

Done?

OK. So for most people the news sound WONDERFUL. Which on many levels it is. Lovely beaches, perfect weather, a "two year vacation on the Navy's dime." Right? And those are great things, don't get me wrong. But the actual logistics of it all? Horrendous.

Moving 3 kids and 2 dogs is going to be the death of me. The schools are terrible. There is a 6 month long process to get the dogs over there. Ubu our black lab is currently too fat to fly...seriously. So we are going on a diet.

The housing wait is 6+ months long. We could live in a hotel forever.

My bitching fest could go on forever, so I will pause. Not stop....pause. So be prepared for more whining and complaining in future posts.

I have been so distracted by the orders that I have been unable to maintain my blog but hope to catch up here now that I have a little more stability in my life.

The hardest and saddest part to me is leaving my family. (Dan's family???? SIONARA!!!!) The thought of taking my kids away from their grandparents is very slowly fracturing the very heart of me. I am so jealous of their relationship with Grandma and Poppa. Living a mile away and running over for "sneak attack" hugs and kisses, just to say goodnight. My kids have no idea the change that is ahead. And my very core aches at the thought. We are a close family and there is an incredibly tight bond there. So I know the next two years will be hard, but the relationship will remain close. But in the meantime, the change for us is going to be drastic. And I dread it.

But everyday I wake up, take a deep breath, put my head down and move forward into a new, unknown adventure for our future. It should be an interesting ride. Aloha.

How Much Longer????

2008-08-26T09:15:00.000-07:00

I am counting down the days...hours...minutes...until the kids go back to school. I am giddy. Positively dancing with glee knowing that in a week, they will be back at school where they belong. Out of my hair! No more grocery shopping with all 3 kids, no more whining and bickering from the hours of 7:30 and 2:30!!!! Yeah!!!! I am a happy woman. Well...I will be. Come next Tuesday.

As for now, that is another story. Let me give you a small glimpse into what my summer has been like:

Yesterday I took the boys to get a haircut - photo to follow soon. Afterwards I decided to take them next door to the shoe store even though I was already overwrought. Stupid mommy moment.

I proceed to have the kids measured. All 3 have outgrown their shoes at once. Damn. I just bought new shoes LAST month. Of course they have nothing for the boys in their sizes so while I am trying shoes on Red, the boys begin to trash the joint. Shoes everywhere. Stinky actually started trying to tear down the racks of shoes. I was purple with frustration.

Temper tantrums in abundance!

Boo started having a fit because he found Lightning McQueen shoes 4 sizes too big and wanted them. Stinky laid on the floor in the checkout line and screamed.

Then he stood up, took off all his clothes except his shorts, threw them at me and proceeded to run about the store shrieking and laughing. I could NOT catch them. People pointed and laughed. Encouraged them even! As I ran and shouted and looked like an idiot who never should have been appointed children.

Red stood on the sidelines and coached them. "She's coming!!!" She would shout to them. And the giggles would head off in another direction.

I grabbed her and hollered like a lunatic at her as people tsk tsked at me for losing it.

Finally I was able to capture the littlest one and made Red hold him down.

I eventually caught Stinky and ranted all the way to the car about the beating to follow.

Thank you Jesus that summer is coming to a close. Can we skip this next year??

Another Day at the Office

2008-08-11T07:42:00.000-07:00

As I was cooking dinner once night, Red looks at me and says,

"Mommy, when I grow up....I don't want to be a mommy."

A little hurt, but curious I ask her why.

"Mommys work ALLLLLL the time. They cook, they clean they do laundry, dishes....."

So proud and smiling, I say

"That's true, but I love you."

Red sits and ponders for a while.

"Daddies.....they don't do anything!"

Sprouting

2008-07-16T14:45:00.000-07:00

My kids are growing too fast. I hear it is an epidemic. Little ones going to bed one night and waking up full grown. It seems to be happening in our house. And oh how, most days, I really hate it.

Red is in her last week of Kindergarten. Soon she will be a first grader and in REAL school. School where they hunt you down and arrest you for not taking them kind of school. As if that wasn't bad enough, she has to go and lose her first tooth. Which was a wild ride of drama.
She came home from school and decided to eat a tortilla. Next thing you know she comes tearing into the room screaming and blood all over her face and the unsuspecting tortilla. Lots of screaming and begging not to touch it later, out pops a little baby tooth. So small and kind of disgusting. I remember that tooth growing in. I remember that tooth biting me and drawing blood while breastfeeding. I remember the sleepless nights because of that tooth. And still, I am sad to see it gone. And that little gap sitting in front is another reminder that I may wake up tomorrow and Red will be off in college.

On the other end of the spectrum we have little Boo who is well on his way of potty training. I can't imagine a life without diapers and a huge box of Kirkland brand wipes. I wouldn't even know how to clean half the messes in my house without those handy wipes. But here he is my littlest hooligan maneuvering his way through toddlerhood at an amazing speed while I just stand by and watch. However do you stop this? My once very quiet little baby is jabbering non stop and says new things every day. I can't believe how much he is talking now. How I miss the baby days that are becoming non-existent in our house. Another chapter creaking closed as I watch teary eyed.

At night as I tuck Red, Stinky and Boo into bed I tickle them and beg them to stop growing. JUST STOP!

Red puts her not so chubby little hands on my face and says, "I have to mom. I know you don't want me to, but I just have to grow up."

It's just too fast, love.

Who's the Beast with the Muffin Top?

2008-07-02T09:39:00.001-07:00

I've been a little stressed lately. I know I said in my recent post that I am getting thicker skin and letting criticism roll off my back. I was full of crap. It drives me nuts. There is a profound difference, I have discovered, between "letting it go" and stuffing it down. Here all this time, I have assumed I am letting the negative comments about my parenting or my kids go, but in reality I have been stuffing it. Stuffing it deep deep down. And the other day....it blew.

I was at the grocery store. I had been particularly irresponsible and went to see a movie in the morning when I would usually do my shopping and decided to take both of my boys to the store with me after school. Dum dum dum!!!

This is a stressful event. It is stressful with an average preschooler most often, but with MY lovable ball of wonderfulness, it is an exquisite challenge. For his credit, Stinky was having a pretty good day. He was somewhere on the spectrum of typical 3 year old obnoxiousness, but not much more.

He was loud. He likes to hear his voice in big, open rooms. Heck. Maybe I would like to do that too sometimes. He would grab bags of cookies occasionally and holler, "I want these!!!". Truthfully, I want to do that myself. I can see me, walking down the candy aisle, grabbing a box of Milk Duds and screaming, "I want to eat these!!!!" to some unsuspecting fellow shopper. Oh, the constraints of politeness and adulthood...

By the time we were at the deli counter, Stinky was flicking at my last nerve. He was just busy. Jumping up and down, pressing his face up against the glass and ogling the cheeses. He stepped back suddenly and bumped his head on the cart of an old lady. He began to cry.

I tried quickly to soothe him, and then looked at the lady and said, "Stinky, you need to say excuse me." He was very preoccupied with the bump on his head. All the while, Boo is hollering his head off, absolutely DONE with sitting in the cart and ready to tear open some Cookies.

The lady then walks past me and in her very best holier than thou tone informed me, "You KNOW....you do have to WATCH them."

I felt a bubbling sensation. A violent shaking from deep within. I was sweating and my heart was racing from the stress of the day and them BLAM!!!!

I lost it at the old lady. "I AM watching them!!!! What do you THINK I am doing?
I am here with 2 kids under 4 and I just need to get FOOD!!!!" I went on a little more. My chest heaving....my eyes glaring.

She looked incredibly taken aback. Nobody back talks THAT generation. She quickly skulked off.

I noticed that no one at the deli counter would look me in the eye. Isn't it amazing that some little old lady is rude to me, and in an effort to defend myself I become the bad guy? Do you know how many other little old ladies I have just smiled politely at and moved on. She got me on the wrong day.

What I SHOULD have said is "Oh ma'am, we're just getting started. Next we are going to drive drunk, run with scissors and all the while wearing dirty underpants!"

I've been busy...

2008-06-30T08:47:00.000-07:00

rolling in money...

Um...not really. I have been keeping myself busy selling my stuff obsessively on Craigslist. When I get in these binges, nothing is safe. It's the way I make some extra money. I have a bank account that I never closed and use it to stash my cash so I can buy Christmas presents etc without Dan knowing. He's wise to the account of course, but he never knows how much I have. I think it drives him crazy. "We don't have secrets!" he will tell me righteously.

But, hell, I have earned....or stolen that money fair and square!

I'll shave off of the grocery bill now and then. I have my ways.

I was able to save up $600 for our trip to Hawaii.

My next project is Christmas. Dan deserves something nice. And although he would NEVER tell me it is HIS money. At birthday and Christmas time I feel like I am buying him presents with HIS money.

If I "steal" it from him first, I somehow feel self sufficient.

I'd share with you my sneaky ways of stashing money...but he's like BIG BROTHER...always listening. :) Can't let him catch on. He found my stash of cash once, before I had a chance to deposit it in the account and he started dipping into it. Tsk tsk. Rookie mistake, GingersMom.

Giggles

2008-06-16T07:10:00.000-07:00

This morning my 5 and 3 year olds and I were discussing bad dreams and monsters. A big concern in our house these days. We sing the Veggie Tale's song "God is bigger than the Boogie Man" song and it usually eases their little minds. Then I remind them that Jesus is in their hearts and always with them so they don't need to be scared.

Red: But mom, Jesus isn't bigger than the Boogie Man and the Monsters. (looking scared)

Mom: Well, honey, Jesus IS God. So of course he is bigger than the Boogie Man.

Red: (Giggling) Oh, I didn't know that. I just thought they work together.

Stinky: Jesus is bigger. But I am stronger than the monsters. I know the Kung Fu.

Is my face red?

2008-06-14T06:30:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a surreal experience. I came home after running errands and my husband said, "Hey, you got a weird email...." (smirk on his face). I glance over and I gasp...

Of all people in the world, who should have found my blog and left a comment? None other than my very first crush from childhood. As if that is not funny enough, me being me of course, wrote about him on my blog. Which is OF COURSE the post he found. (Hi Lance! ***me waving like a dork***).

I look at Dan who I can see is terribly amused as he sees my face ACTUALLY turning red. I laughed so hard and said, "I am 31 years old and I am totally embarrassed!!" (Don't let that fool you, really - I still am in my early twenties...really!!! It just slipped out)

Anyway, it was a wonderful surprise and the comment he left, as Dan put it, was very classy. And sweet. (So if you stop by again Lance...leave your email, I'd love to chat).

And so I will leave you with this little tidbit along with a little bit of my dignity because that is what I do...

I remember being in Kindergarten and my mom sometimes dropped me off at Lance's house so his mom could watch me for a while before school. (I did afternoon kindergarten). I have hair that is straight as a pin, so my mom used to put those spongy pink rollers in my hair at night...you know the ones you see on frumpy housewives wearing a robe and bunny slippers?? Yeah...me...age 6. I always loved the curly hair...did not love? Lance seeing me with the spongy curlers. I would have a fit. Mom never understood what is was about. I knew she had ruined my chances of dropping to his knee and proposing right then at a ripe age of 6 and a half. Well...just another thing to tell my therapist I suppose.

But then again, my mom may need some therapy of her own. When I called to tell her about it she said, "You're so lucky! Your first crush looks you up and tells you he liked you too. Timmy Roper....never saw me for dirt."

Now if you dare...who was your first crush?

Bookworm

2008-06-10T13:08:00.000-07:00

I love to read. I actually eat books. When I am on a book binge I can read a dozen books a month. I've been to the library 4 times in the last 2 weeks. Once I get started I just can't read enough. It is a nice escape and it is relaxing.

I like romance novels (like Nicholas Sparks) or funny lighthearted novels (Jennifer Weiner) and books that are a little edgier and tackle deeper issues (Jodi Picoult - my current fave).
I have been pretty limited in my knowledge of good authors. Like I said Picoult is my newest obsession and I have read almost all of her books, or have them on hold at the library. She was recommended to me last year when I put out a request for suggested authors. If you haven't read one of her books...run, don't walk to the library and try one out. They are very intricate and moving. Love them.

But now I am running out of books by my usual authors and need some new ideas. I don't like to read mysteries or fantasy. It just can't capture my interest - or scares the bejeezees out of me. I tend to really like books about relationship between people - not necessarily romance, but more about relationships than "issues". If that makes sense.
So how about you? Who is on your MUST read list?

Oh Mom.

2008-06-06T13:32:00.000-07:00

After school today, Stinky and I both were in a good mood. He had not been sent to the director's office for once ALL DAY and I was proud.

Mommy: Stinky, do you know what makes me happy?

Stinky: Love?

Mommy (heart swelling): Yep. You know what else?

Stinky: Hugs and kisses make you happy!

Mommy (almost in tears): Yep. But what makes me super duperiest happy?

Stinky: Hmmmm....I know...Dresses make you happy!

Mommy (giggling): Sure do bud...sure do. But what makes me super dooper duperiest of all?

Stinky: I don't know!

Mommy: Having you be my little boy of course!

Stinky (blushing) : Hee hee....oh mom...

A day in the life

2008-06-02T16:59:00.000-07:00

My middle son has a behavioral disorder. It still remains undiagnosed. We have several guesses on the table ranging from ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder) to a sensory disorder, to adjustment disorder.

At this point I don't really care what it is called I just want him to be normal.

He's a wonderful boy. He's handsome, athletic, smart as a whip and very sweet. The problem is, you never when he is going to snap. Just when I think I have a handle on things, they go south again.

Nobody said parenting was easy. Yeah...but nobody told me it would be this hard.

Don't get me wrong, I love him. I love him so much it actually physically hurts. Some days this stuff rolls off me like water on a duck's back. Other days I just look at him and my heart clenches. Things are better than they were, but now I see we have so so so far to go.

I really debated sharing too much about this...airing laundry and all. But the truth is, this blog is about me...who I am...what my life is like. And not expressing this part of it isn't really expressing who I am.

My little man loves me. I know this. He tells me how pretty I am every single day. Over and over and over. It's like he contains these wild emotions and he so desperately has to share them. Good ones and bad. So when he is feeling loving, he feels it BIG. So much that it oozes out his pores. He wants to hug me constantly and share everything he has within himself. He will kiss me and compliment me like it is our last chance. It's like he aches inside to make sure that I know he loves me.

Ten minutes later he could be the exact opposite. The contrast is staggering. He is prone to violent outbursts. Just when I think I know what is causing them, the pattern changes. Or there is no pattern. It used to be concentrated on me. That was bad enough. He would infuriate me to the point where I would completely lose it. Screaming, shoving him into his room and shaking with anger and understanding how easy it would be to go too far. Then he would cry and run to me and we would hold each other weeping and confused. Other times, I would feel so broken I would lay on the floor and just let him hit me. How do you defend yourself against that - emotionally or physically?

In those moments, I wonder if he really does hate me. But I know he doesn't. I can sense his frustration all around him. I know it is something he fighting against. I know in those desperate moments when he hugs me so tight and says over and over and over, "I love you mommy", that those are his truest feelings.

Nowadays, his rages are less severe. But there is underlying anger still there and he lashes out at other children. Which to me is worse. The extreme violence has been tempered and now he just hits unprovoked. But it is short lived, generally.

I've come a long way. That giant gift wrapped box of guilt that they handed me the day he was born is just a little bit lighter. I've learned to get thicker skin when I am judged by strangers...or even people that I know. I've learned not to (always) crumple inside when I hear criticism of my parenting. I've learned that it really isn't my fault. And that was a tough one to let go. That one still creeps up on me if I am not careful. It slips through the cracks and I have to beat it back out again. I've learned that NOBODY could do a better job with him than Dan and me because God hand selected us to be his parents. And for some reason, he thought we were the ideal ones to guide him through this challenge in life.

I think I have been able to overcome the depression that I was sinking into. There are days where I have to fight tooth and nail against it. But most days, I grab onto my faith in the Lord with both hands and march forward into the mire.

I believe Stinky is special. I believe there is a purpose for him that is beyond the norm. I believe he will be an extraordinary man and a great joy in my life. He already does bring me joy. Lots of it. It's just that many times, the joy just doesn't outweigh the worry.

I hesitate here, before I publish this, thinking - how could a mom write these things about her son? But it is truth. It's my life. It's who I am. And also, I have spent hours, days even poring over other mom blogs of people experiencing the same things and it has been a source of comfort to me.

I love my son. And not a day has gone by, even at it's worst, that I haven't felt that way until it hurts.

Cinderella

2008-06-01T07:59:00.000-07:00

I got a sad email today. I don't know if you have ever heard of Steven Curtis Chapman. He's incredible singer and song writer - we actually used some of his music in our wedding ceremony. He's an incredibly gifted and Godly man.

The email I received told me that just a few days ago his 5 year old daughter was killed in a tragic accident. Her older brother, a teenager I believe, was backing up the car in their driveway when he hit little Maria Chapman who had the terrible timing of running behind the car at that moment when she was running out to greet her brother.

Steven Curtis Chapman's newest song to be released is called "Cinderella" which he wrote for his daughters. It is exquisite and will melt the heart of any daddy of a little girl. Even if you don't like his style of music, it is heart warming. And in light of the circumstances, devastating. I urge you to have a listen. You'll want to run and find your kids and hold on as tight as you can.

Aloha Baby!

2008-05-28T08:59:00.000-07:00

I just got back yesterday from my awesome week in Kauai. It couldn't have been better. This was the view from our room...

This is the hot guy I went with....

This is the kind of food we ate.... (chocolate deep fried truffles)

I watched Dan swing like a monkey from a tree into a waterfall...

We had romantic dinners....

And some not romantic...yeah baby...Can you say Costco Dog?

Drank ice cold coconuts....

Had my first real try of sushi...

And well....blush...

And of course, nothing says "Hawaii" like the chickens...

You can imagine all the fun "rooster"...ahem...jokes that Dan came up with....

Went horseback riding on ocean bluffs....

All in all had the time of my life with the LOVE of my life.

Snail Style

2008-05-15T07:42:00.000-07:00

I do not have a green thumb. Most plants that I own have a death wish. If I don't kill them myself, they commit suicide. It is unfortunate, but I keep trying to put flowers in my front yard. My latest attempt has been to plant bare root roses. I even saw a bloom!!

I am beaming with pride.

However, if there are any of you out there who exist that know even less about gardening than me, you need to know about snails. Snails eat flowers. My yard is the all you can eat buffet on our cul de sac. They come from miles around to eat MY flowers. I guess I should feel proud that I am that well known, but still....

So I put out snail bait. It attracts the little boogers out from my plants, they eat it delightfully and then they die. Kind of sizzle and turn into goo. Yes, it is gross but I find it morbidly satisfying. I have a snail graveyard in my garden now.

As I was putting out the snail bait yesterday I found something fascinating and disturbing. Everywhere I looked I saw Snail Sex. Yes...a veritable snail-sex-paloosa in my front yard. Bow Chicka Bow Wow! The Snail Inspiration Point of San Diego. Apparently my marigolds are a powerful aphrodisiac. There had to be at least half a dozen "couples". Ever seen snail sex? Kinda of like a traffic accident, grotesque and yet you can't look away.

I noticed while I was drizzling snail pellets all over the garden that one happened to fall right on top of one of the "busy" couples.

Who knew they didn't have to actually eat the poison?

This morning there is nothing left but their empty shells. I call them Romeo and Juliet. Who knew that the most sex and the most romance in my house was happening right beneath the rose bushes?

Depraved

2008-05-09T06:39:00.000-07:00

My diet is draining on me. I have been deprived of chocolate for WAY too long. It's so bad that I have been reduced to turning to Internet Food Porn. I'm ashamed.

I sneak into the office....give a a quick look around...good...Dan is playing with the kids. I'll have a few euphoric moments to search the web and fantasize about chocolate cake. Then after I get a good tantalizing look, maybe I'll check out some brownie recipes. Mmmm.... That's hot.

Get a load of these babies!

1 box Duncan Hines chocolate cake mix
Bake as directed on box.
FILLING:
1 c. evaporated milk1 c. sugar24 lg. marshmallows1 (7 oz.) can Angel Flake coconut
Combine milk and sugar; add marshmallows and heat until melted. Add coconut. Pour over cake while hot.
TOPPING:
1 1/2 c. sugar1/2 c. evaporated milk1/2 c. butter1 1/2 c. chocolate chips1 c. pecans
Mix sugar, butter, and milk. Bring to a boil, add chips, stir until melted. Add nuts. Pour over cake. Just like an Almond Joy candy bar.

Chocolate Cake
stir together:
2 c. sugar
2 c. flour
Boil:
1 stick butter or margarine
1/4 c. cocoa
1 c. water
Add cocoa mixture to dry ingredients then add:
2 eggs
1/2 c. milk
1 t. vanilla
1 t. baking soda
Mix until well blended. Bake at 375 in a greased bundt pan for 30 minutes.
Penuche Frosting (from the Cake Mix Doctor Cookbook)
1 c. brown sugar
1 stick butter or margarine
cook over medium heat until well blended (2 mins), then add
1/4 c. whole milk
Bring to a boil and set it aside to cool slightly.
Pour over
2 c. powdered sugar
mix with an electric hand mixer until smooth and pour over cake while still warm. (If it hardens too much while working with it, you can heat it up again on the stove.)

American Soldiers At it Again

2008-05-07T09:38:00.000-07:00

Proof of abuse by our Troops:

Armed American Troops Force Iraqis to Seesaw Until They Talk!

Iraqi Child Bites GI In Self Defense After Obvious Torture!

GI Falls Asleep On Duty While Using Iraqi Child As Body Armor!

GI Overheard to say 'Talk or I'll tickle you till you pee!' More Evidence Of Failed US Intelligence Policy.

Soldier Attempts to Eat Iraqi Child !

Clear Evidence of Forced Labor by Troops!

Iraqis Grateful That American Forces Did Not Open Fire During Soccer Game!

Soldier Caught At 'Tickle-Torture' To Extract Intelligence!

GI Forces Iraqi Child To Hang By Fingertips!

No comment here. There's nothing funny about this one.

May the good Lord bless every one of our troops wherever they are!

Fully Detoxed

2008-05-05T13:20:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I am finally finished with the Arbonne 7 Day Body Cleanse. Day 5-7 went pretty smoothly. I think I may have given the wrong impression with my last post. The "cramps" are not terrible. It is more like waves of discomfort. I would not call them painful.

Day 4 was probably my roughest day.

Day 5 and 6 I was getting pretty tired of drinking the solution, and didn't drink enough water. But the days went by without much to remark about. I was back to pooping 2-3 times a day instead of the several times a day like I did on days 3-4.

I feel pretty good. No major revelation, but I feel good. Lighter. That is a good description of how I feel. My tummy is a little flatter, I don't feel bloated and I am sleeping well. I think my body is a little more "in tune". I am getting really tired around 10pm. My body is warning me that I need to get to bed so I can get 8 hours of sleep. I wasn't like that before, and now I am trying harder to listen.

All in all I think it was worthwhile. Arbonne, recommends that you do this every 30 days. And they say that with each month it feels even better. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I think that is a little extreme. I have one other box of product and I am debating whether or not I will do it next month, to experiment or if I will try it every several months, or just 2 times a year. I think this is the kind of thing to do in moderation.

It is an eye opening experience that makes you realize what is just sitting in your body. No wonder we have poochy bellies etc. Even if you eat tons of fiber like I do, our bodies sometimes need to just flush it all out and start fresh.

So bottom line (pun intended) I would recommend the experience.

Arbonne Detox - the good the bad and the ugly

2008-05-02T09:02:00.000-07:00

Ok, so day 4 or the Arbonne 7-day Body Cleanse was a little rough. Probably the roughest day of all for me. Which is different than most other people that I talked to about it. I felt like I had an "off" stomach all morning. I tried to work out, but didn't get too far into it. It was a pretty intense Billy Blanks workout though. I was probably being too ambitious.

Also, to keep good score, I did have a few caffeinated drinks which you are SUPPOSED to avoid. I ate a bunch of fiber too, so along with a cleanse will probably just exacerbate the trouble.

I was a little stressed out last night and didn't sleep great. But I can't attribute that to the detox. To be honest, I probably slept better that I would have under the stress I was carrying had I not been doing detox.

Another bonus, I was stagnant for WEEKS at the same weight and I have started moving down on the scale again. I'm sure that is in large part because the bulk of food doesn't stay in my system for long, so the weight loss may be temporary? I am hoping it just gave my body a jump start and I can start losing again. I am now down 13 lbs total. (Not from the detox, mind you, just from when I started my WW program).

Bonus # 3, by "mommy belly" is not nearly as pronounced. I don't have pre-baby belly either and I did not magically grow a six pack. But the, I've-had-3-kids-and-will-permanently-look-4-months-pregnant belly is reducing. Maybe only 2 or 3 months pregnant now. LOL.

Those who don't want gross personal details - just stop reading now.

Yesterday was lots of pooping. It's all very loose at this point. Not uncontrollable diarrhea, but it is frequent. I had a bunch of cramping yesterday, but I didn't drink enough water and I am sure the lethargy was due to my not eating much protein. Bad combo. Keep in mind, the cramping is fairly mild and is just a warning you are going to poop soon. Some detoxes don't give you an advanced warning system and you will be doubled over in cramping.

If you decide to do this, don't skimp on cheap toilet paper. You use alot and your bum will get raw. That was an unfortunate discovery.

All in all it has not been a bad experience so far. I am waiting for a burst of energy that I have heard comes on day 6 or 7. Today is day 5. Nothing major to report this morning. Except I am down nearly 3 lbs. Woo hoo!

For those of you who are OVER my journey through the bowels of Arbonne, hang in there. Only 3 days left.

Detox Day 3 and going Strong

2008-04-30T14:46:00.001-07:00

I slept like a rock last night. I woke up feeling so refreshed, I couldn't believe it was only 6 am. Now granted, I was tired so I made it to bed at 10:20 or so which is about an hour earlier than normal. But still, I feel good today.

Now for the "icky" part. I did end up with one bout of diarrhea yesterday. But it was not too awful. Not burning or painful. It was preceded by some cramping that definitely got my attention and was not comfortable. But as soon as I went to the bathroom I felt fine.

The same thing happened today and that is the only BM I have had today. I've had a little more cramping, at least this morning. I was a little worried driving home from my kid's school that I was going to have a problem. But it really is just the intestine pulling the water in that causes the cramping. And it does not last, just for a moment or so and then it passes.

So far, the only big difference in the way I feel is that I have been sleeping well - and normally I wake up a lot. I also don't feel bloated which is nice. No significant changes in my weight, but I have been dieting for a while so I didn't really expect that. I hear you feel a big difference in your energy level by the end of the week. So we shall see.

Detox Day 2

2008-04-29T15:15:00.000-07:00

Ok. so if you read my last post, and I assume you have and have commented because I am comment whore, you know that I have started a 7 Day Detox Body Cleanse from Arbonne. I was a little afraid at first about the idea. I have heard that some cleanses are actually PAINFUL. I've heard that you can have creepy things come out of your body. I've heard that they are unhealthy.

And sometimes I think they are, if you aren't careful about which product you choose. I haven't had that experience thank goodness - at least so far. Don't worry I will be honest with you about my experience. So here goes...

I am on Day 2. Day 1 was fairly uneventful. Uneventful because I was EXHAUSTED. I thought maybe it was because I was just tired from a long weekend, but after researching and asking around, that is totally normal. I could barely stay awake. I was in bed falling asleep as soon as the kids were down.

As for the bathroom issue - skip this part if you don't want to know - I'm gonna be honest. Yesterday was not out of the realm of normal. I think I had 2 or 3 BM. Also, since you drink 32 oz of water along with the detox solution, obviously you pee a LOT.

Day 2 has been slightly different. I have had some mild cramping and had 3 or 4 BMs so far and it is only mid-afternoon. I don't have diarrhea though and that is what I was expecting. Stools will be looser of course, but nothing that hurts or burns. I have heard that you want to avoid eating too much citrus because of all the extra "activity" during the detox week. The cramping is from the intestines pulling water into the intestine so it can cleanse the waste material through your system. That is why it is so important to stay hydrated.

Today I feel pretty normal. Nothing too drastically different, but the deep exhaustion is gone. I plan on going on a nice walk later. I hear that light and relaxing exercise is very helpful and that you should avoid strenuous workouts during your detox week.

I'll keep you posted!

Stuff You Should Know About...And Then Again Maybe Not

2008-04-28T15:25:00.000-07:00

1. I just finished a FANTASTIC Bible study with my gal pals. It was Beth Moore's "A Woman's Heart". I'm not exactly sure why it is called that. It is a study of the Old Testament Tabernacle and how it relates to us today. How everything in the Bible, everything in that Tabernacle represented Christ and where the Tabernacle is today. When it was first introduced to me I thought, snooze fest. But it was actually one of the greatest and most intensely satisfying studies I have ever journeyed through. And I hope to do it again with Dan since I think it applies to both men and women.

2. On a lighter note, Weight Watchers just came out with a new ice cream treat. It comes in a package of two little containers of ice cream that are 2 points each. And they are MONEY! I like the mint chip flavor. The cup looks small at first, but they pack quite a bit in there and I feel satisfied when I am done. Other flavors are Chocolate Brownie and Cookie Dough. The cookie dough is pretty good, but I wasn't a fan of the Brownie. The texture of the brownie in it was a little "off" for me. But my neighbor, Dez, loves it. Give it a whirl, all my fellow chubby gals. It's worth a try.

3. I am on Day 1 of the Arbonne 7 Day Body Cleanse. It is part of their new SeaSource Detox Spa line. So far today I feel pretty sluggish. I feel tired and have a bit if a headache. But no running to the bathroom. I have always wanted to do a cleanse but was scared of a lot of the products out there. But after some research I have learned that it can really help with fatigue, weight gain, depression, body aches, sleeplessness and lots more. All of which I have experienced in the last several months. So since Arbonne came out with this product, and it much gentler than alot of the extreme cleanses out there I am giving it a whirl. I'm going to attempt to give a day to day progress report for anyone interested. The products comes in 7 little vials. Each day you mix one vial with 32 oz of water and sip it SLOWLY throughout the day for 7 days. So far I have heard day 1 and 2 are a bit rough, day 3-6 you start to feel a difference and by day 7 you sleep like a baby. I'm going to tell you what I really think and try not to hype it up. No real earth shattering news yet for you. I'll keep ya posted.
4. An finally - Sorry to mom if you are reading this - but I recently heard about an online "intimacy enhancer" store called Book22. Book 22 refers to Songs of Soloman, the 22nd book of the Bible. It has all kinds of games, toys etc. The owners remove pornographic and inappropriate packaging and focus on products that the couple can use together. I found the idea amusing and intriguing. Check it out and have fun!

That LOVE is MAGICAL

2008-04-23T12:14:00.000-07:00

It seems that everywhere I look, there is love, weddings, engagement! Spring fever maybe? Dan and I attended a wedding last week. It was beautiful. Like most women, I LOVE weddings. It used to be I would go as a single woman, taking notes, silently critiquing and planning for my big SOMEDAY.

Now when I go, I like to just soak it in. The "remember whens"... Dan and I always watch the groom instead of the bride during the processional. They always have this big old sloppy grin. It is a face you rarely see elsewhere - and that love is something magical. I'll never forget Dan's goofy smile as I walked down the aisle. I'll never forget the terror that almost consumed me before the ceremony, before the doors opened and how it all fell away when I saw his face and the deepest calm I have ever known came upon me. That love is something magical.

As I watched the couple this last week join in their first kiss (she had no veil which I find so sad because aside from the sloppy grin, the lifting of the veil is the best part!) more memories flooded me. Dan's trembling fingers, how his tuxedo jacket felt against my hand, the way he leaned to one side and grabbed me with abandon and kissed me in a way that I'll always remember. That love is magical.

A week ago, my sweet friend Rachel got engaged. I am so filled with joy at this news. The happiness that I KNOW she is feeling, the overwhelming passion for a man and the realization that everything you had hoped for is standing in front of you and asking you that one question. To share your life together. I tear up as I look at the picture of her delicate hand and the shiny, elegant new engagement ring. I remember spending hours staring at my own. Waking up the morning after and giggling out loud like a little girl on Christmas day. Those moments are unbeatable, breath taking and nearly heaven. That love is magical.

It is all around me in tiny little ways. The sound of Dan's key in the door still makes me smile, my kids chasing one another and laughing loudly, the smell of Dan's skin after he shaves, the whispered "I love you, Mommy". These moments are what make life worth living. That love is something magical.

Gap Tooth

2008-04-19T08:23:00.000-07:00

I have been wallowing in self pity this week. After 10 years and many narrow escapes, they got me. Held me down, plied me with sedatives and ripped those suckers out. My wisdom teeth. EEEEK! I guess after 3 kids and mind of mush I didn't deserve anything with the title "Wisdom".

It's been a great excuse to ignore my diet and eat an obscene amount of chocolate cake. (Hey - it's soft...) And ignore any attempt at exercise. (Bad for the stitches, you know).

I wonder how long I can milk this one?

Be Afraid

2008-04-04T19:30:00.000-07:00

Frustrations

2008-04-04T07:34:00.000-07:00

Ok, I have been back on my Weight Watchers journey for going on 5 weeks now. The first 2 weeks I did great. Lost about 9 lbs. Most of it water, yes, I know that. But Her it is 5 weeks later and I have not lost ANY more weight. I am feeling very frustrated. I have been a saint this week. Never going over on points, and never DARING to dip into those floating points. I have been active, keeping busy. What else can I do??

I don't want to give up. I really want to look nice for when we go to Hawaii so that I don't embarrass myself in a swim suit. Last week I set my goal. 7 more weeks until Hawaii. I want to lose 10lbs. It is looking bleak.

My desire to gorge and spread my whole body with a tub of chocolate icing is overwhelming. And yet I have refrained.

I am really mad at myself that I let the weight come back. If only I had just made myself weigh in a month earlier. If only....If only....

Uh-oh....the Easter candy is calling my name....Gingers mom....Gingers mom.... I better go hide.

Budding Life

2008-04-03T08:22:00.000-07:00

The last 6 months have been a journey for me. I look back to last summer or so and see the way my life was and look at it now and in many ways I barely recognize where I was. For me, the fall brought about some pretty dark days. Some of you know the trials I have had to face with my middle born. For those of you who don't, I was in the midst of a very steep downward spiral with him. I would say that he was living up to his nickname, Stinky, but that barely scratches the surface.

My little man has so many wonderful, charming qualities. His startling blue eyes and round chubby cheeks make me melt. His soft, sweet voice begging my attention just one more time before I turn his light out at night. "You look pretty, mommy..." - at least 10 times a day. The qualities I've always known that are there...I could see those sparks of the tenderhearted man that I know he will become even when our troubles were at their worst. That is the coolest thing about motherhood - looking at your kids and always have the ability to see to the heart of them - the person they WILL become, the person you are hoping to mold them to be. And then on your knees in desperation, praying you don't mess it up.

Little Stinky put me through the wringer. No doubt about it. I'll probably continue to share more as I distance myself from the experience. But for now, I am happy to say that the clouds have begun to clear.

I've taken a long breather from Arbonne. As much as I loved it, my focus HAD to be on my son. And that took every ounce of my being and then a little bit more. As I am gaining emotional strength, I am considering my future there and not sure what I feel.

I look back to last summer and see someone desperately lonely. And today I can say, that really isn't true. I have had a burst of new friendships that have done wonders for me. I feel happier, more fulfilled. It is amazing what companionship can do for a drowning soul. I feel content with my life in a way that I have not felt in quite a while. Sometimes friendships just touch you in such a profound way you feel as though it is bigger than you somehow. Does that make sense?

I have been going to a Bible study every other Thursday night with them, which has been good for me. As much as I TRULY, WHOLEHEARTEDLY believe in my faith, I had become stagnant. Somehow, these new friendships have brought about a new "interest", or passion in my feelings and relationship with Christ.

We do playdates once or twice a week, we help each other with childcare. All the things friends do for each other - but I had somehow been missing in my life for a while. It has made me realize how the smallest things we do, can affect eachother so profoundly. And if we dig deep and look to Someone much greater, the help can found.

Never ask...

2008-04-02T11:08:00.000-07:00

Mommy: Stinky, what does a pig say?

Stinky: Oink!!

Mommy: What does a bird say?

Stinky: Tweet tweet!!

Mommy: What does a dog say?

Stinky: Ruff Ruff!!

Mommy: What does a MOMMY say?

Stinky: Moo!!!

Mom

2008-04-01T08:56:00.000-07:00

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. ~Peter De Vries

Blessings

2008-03-31T14:46:00.000-07:00

I had a weekend full of fun, snarly children, fattening food and wonderful news. It was Brady's 2nd birthday party which is always accompanied by lots of eating and fighting and hitting. It just isn't a toddler party without all that. At least for the members of our tribe.

It was the year of Thomas and Cars. Two year olds barely branch out in their interests, only allowing a few themes in at a time. I am hoping this is the last Thomas birthday I will have to entertain or, should I daringly hope, ever attend. It is the most mind numbing and costly hobby a child of only 2 could possibly show interest in. If you have a toddler boy who has yet to discover the island of Sodor, NEVER turn on PBS at 2pm. You'll thank me for that tidbit.

There was one gift that did not land in the typical birthday boy category and I have to say that it was my most treasured gift of all. It was a small, unassuming box that didn't seem to hold anything of great value - maybe an outfit? But as it was opened, a piece of paper sat in the box with 4 very exciting words written upon it.

"A New Baby Cousin"

My brother Kevin and his wife, Tiffany are expecting another baby.

The news of a baby is fantastic and miraculous under normal conditions. But this baby is truly, truly a miracle. My nephew Hudson - their oldest - was very long awaited and finally arrived after much prayer and a round of in-vitro.

My newest (hopefully niece - but I'll take either one) is a complete gift from the Lord. I just know that the faithfulness of our friends and family (and my Gram who was in earnest prayer DAILY) was looked upon with mercy from God and He has blessed us with this tiny life. A life that was predicted never to have been. I am tickeled...hopefully pink.

I have been craving a newborn, so this is a good fix for me. This will be a first though, someone in my family is pregnant and I'm not pregnant with them!

It does make me - only momentarily - think wistfully about a swelling belly. And then my 3 hooligans give me a swift kick, and I am reminded why I was on my knees thanking God for Dan's vasectomy just last week.

Fatty Crossing

2008-03-24T16:14:00.000-07:00

I hate chocolate. (I shouldn't have typed that...I didn't really mean it my sweet love....nothing makes my heart go a flutter the way it does at one mere nibble of you). But, without chocolate I would not be back on my weekly treks to the fat meetings. AKA Weight Watchers. That chocolate is so seductive, I cannot keep my wits about me when it charms with its chocolaty wiles.

I have a new cool reason to want to shed these pounds...again. Dan and I are planning a trip to Hawaii in May. It has been hanging in the balance for a while now and it looks like it might actually happen. And if I am going to wear a swimsuit I had better get a bit of a tan and get rid of the mama chub (can you call it mama chub if your youngest child is 2 years old?) so as not to scare all of the tourists away. Beware of the great white!!! Eeeek!

At least I have some motivation. And a vacation...without the small tyrants...sounds heavenly. I don't even know anymore, what do grown ups do on vacation without small kids? Whatever the hell I want I suppose!

Aloha!

Top of the Mornin' To Ya

2008-03-18T07:25:00.000-07:00

Ahhh.... it's been a long time. My husband has thoroughly chastised me that I need to blog more. I guess he thinks it is good for me to express my "creative" side. I suppose he is right. What person shouldn't express themselves about I'm Not Fat Anymore Tattoos, Discussion On The Size of My Boobs, or the many wonders of my favorite word.

Yesterday was St. Patty's Day. A fun and much loved holiday of my husband that I have adopted and made my own. For me, growing up some odd mix of German, Scottish and mutt, St Patty's was nothing more than a day to pretend to love green and pinch people. I remember on St. Patrick's day that landed on a Sunday when I was very little. I was in my underwear, wandering around looking for my mother to put my dress on when my brothers spotted me. "NO GREEN!" they shouted and chased me down the hallway and shrieking. I still remember how much those pinches hurt (I'll make sure to tell my therapist) and you will never catch me on St Patrick's without the signature color.

We had a wonderful time yesterday. It just so happened that Dan had the day off so it really felt like a holiday. We ate corned beef and cabbage of course and I dabbled in a few new recipes. One was called Boxty, which is basically an Irish potato pancake served with Irish honey. The other one was a chocolate mashed potato cake for dessert. Sounds disgusting, right? It was delicious and will become a guaranteed tradition from now on.

I love looking up traditional cuisine from our heritage. Neither side of our families really sent down many recipes from our ancestors. I would love to know how to make a killer sauerbraten adn spaetzle from my roots in Germany or make yummy tamales from Dan's grandmother. Ok, maybe not from that mean old lady, but maybe her mother. :) But I dabble and I try to learn.

We don't normally celebrate at our house with my family, but due to certain circumstances, that's what we did this year. And I truly enjoyed preparing the meal myself and making the day special for my family.

Now back to Weight Watchers I go to moan and wail as I step upon that scale this week.

Éireann go Brách

Suffering...

2008-02-13T15:55:00.000-08:00

I have a dreadful cold. It started the day before yesterday right in the middle of vacuuming my house. I thought it was allergies and had hit the jackpot...I was officially allergic to housework and I could prove it my the major onslaught of sneezing and hacking. Yet it continues and I am sinking into postnasal drip hell. I hate being sick. Just admitting it is a defeat. I blame those short people...the sticky smelly short people that live here.

My head is so stuffy I feel like my sinuses are expanding into a giant helium filled balloon. My body is achey and limp. If you look up into the sky this afternoon and see a pathetic housewife floating by with a swollen head and tattered pajamas....wave.

Definition:

2008-02-12T18:24:00.000-08:00

Despair: Hanging on by a very thin thread to my sanity, waiting ever so desperately for husband to come home any minute to save me from the children only to get a phone call reminding me it is his school night and won't be coming home until after 10pm.

Damn.

From My Sister in Law

2008-01-17T15:15:00.000-08:00

Real Resolutions for Moms
By Karen Ehman

“… But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:13b-14 (ESV)

Devotion:
It’s that time when many of us are making New Year’s resolutions, so how about some resolutions for mothers? Here are mine:

I will put my Bible before the television, the radio, the telephone, and even before good Christian books, for my children will know my priorities by the way they see me spend my free time.

I will make my prayer requests known before God and my children, enlisting their help in the process and informing them of the outcome, for by letting them help when I petition our Lord will they learn of a living God who still answers prayer.

When times of crisis, conflict or confusion arise, I will hit my knees before I hit the phone knowing that by my example my children will discover that although friends are important, God alone is the one who holds the solution to life’s every problem.

I will erase the words “luck” and “lucky” from my vocabulary and will instead by my speech point my children toward the One who orchestrates every detail of our lives and brings all good things to pass, for by this my children will learn of an omniscient God.

When bad things happen, I’ll neither grumble nor complain, but will instead help my children see that in the scope of our lives even the bad times are allowed for a reason, for by this my children will learn quiet trust in their Maker.

When normal childhood mishaps occur, I will remember that although difficult, it is still easier to remove grape juice from off-white carpet than to erase harsh and unloving words hurled at a child whose chubby little fingers have failed her, for by this my children will see a God who understands when our best efforts fall short.

When my children have witnessed something ugly in me - unkind words, an angry temper, “harmless” gossip, biting sarcasm or even my infamous “mommy pout” when things don’t go my way - I will confess it as sin before them seeking their forgiveness, for by this my children will develop the much needed habit of wiping their spiritual slate clean before God and man.

I will teach my children the importance of cleanliness and order while at the same time remain sensitive to the fact that a skinned knee or hurt feeling is more crucial than a spotless floor or uncluttered counter, for by this my children will learn to value people above things.

I will make time for the lonely, the sick, the elderly, the difficult to love, and will bring my children along, for with each afternoon visit, each ride to the doctor, each raked lawn or washed window they will have opportunity to serve Jesus by serving the “least of these.”

I will make our home a haven of rest and retreat from the outside world and a welcomed place for my children’s friends, for with each impromptu backyard soccer game, each video viewed on a rainy day, each cup of hot cocoa or chocolate chip cookie, my children will have opportunity to practice the art of Christian hospitality thereby learning to share all God has given them.

I will by my actions and my speech let my children see a mom love their dad, for by this will my children sense family stability at a time when marriages all around them are crumbling.

I will not require of my children obedience, honesty, patience or kindness without first being willing to submit to the same rules whether in speed limit, in miscounted change from the grocery store or when answering a toddler for the fourteenth time, for by this my children will see a mother who is also learning and not a perfect parent to whom they’ll never measure up.

In all things will I remember that more is caught than is taught.

There are little eyes upon you, mom. You are the first Bible your children will ever read.

Wise

2008-01-07T09:13:00.000-08:00

Cleaning your house while your children are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. (Phyllis Diller)

A New Year Challenge

2008-01-02T18:00:00.000-08:00

A new year is upon us all and I hope this year is one that is full of joy, health and happiness for you. I don't know about you but after the holidays I have found all my pants fitting a lot more snug than they used to. And I have found myself pouting about my expanding figure while munching down cheesecake way to often.

So when I heard about the Arbonne Figure 8 Challenge I was intrigued. I have put feelers out to everyone I know to see who's with me? My goal is to lose 12 lbs before the end of February. I am looking for 10 people to join my "team".

Starting TODAY you can go to www.gofigure8.com and register for the Figure 8 Week Weight Loss Challenge. There are prizes for individuals and teams.

I am joining the weight loss challenge and incorporating Arbonne's newest weight loss products to my diet to help me get there. If we have at least 10 people interested we can make a team and go full speed ahead on this challenge. You have until the end of January to register, but the sooner you register the better our chances of winning! Let me know if you are interested and we can form a team. I will have a prize for the winning member on my team.

Arbonne's products are healthy and safe and encourage a change in lifestyle not just a quick weight loss gimmick. I already have tried the Protein Shakes and Fiber shakes and have been very impressed with the taste. I have also personally tried the Detox tea as well as the Chocolate Mint chew which taste delicious, just like candy with no "diet" chalky taste.

But now they have some great new products that you can see at www.kristincain.myarbonne.com. Which include a fizzing water tablet to boost metabolism and a water relief treatment serum. I can't wait to get my hands on them!

To a happy and THINNER New Year!!

Googly Eyes

2008-01-01T10:14:00.000-08:00

Over the last few months I have had my hands full. I've been pretty stressed out and found myself getting a little depressed. What is the cure for that?

A new puppy. LOL!

Meet Linus. Our newest member. He is a 3 month old Boston Terrier. Because if you are going to have a little dog...it better be so ugly it is cute. And he is. He has crazy googly eyes that stick out on the sides of his head. If we didn't have a fish named Steve he would be Steve Buschemi the second.

Some people are deliriously happy about it!

Some are not....

But all in all, there are laughs and giggles and pee pee puddles all around the house. What a great Christmas present!

The pretty one

2007-12-21T18:28:00.000-08:00

Dan and I had our first parent-teacher conference yesterday. We went in nervous. Kinda like being sent to the principal's office. I felt on the edge of my seat as though I was abou.t to be evaluated on my parenting by a "professional". Thank goodness, Red's teacher is a blessing from heaven and a complete doll.

We chatted like old friends. Rolled our eyes together at Red's crazy antics.

Basically we found out Red like to talk. Shocked anyone?

Also, to Dan's dismay she informed us that Red's biggest problem is she is pretty. So pretty in fact, all the boys love her and beg to sit with her. This will be her biggest challenge in school. She bats her eyes and cocks her head in that oh so coy way she has and poof....she gets her way.

Damn. I wish that had been my problem.

Lucky litte redhead.

Funny Suprises

2007-12-19T14:34:00.000-08:00

This story begins nearly 10 years ago. My parents used to pastor a traditional church many years ago. After some tragic events, our family left that ministry in a hurt and broken state. Those events, which I'd rather not elaborate upon, changed my life profoundly. I was in Bible College, ambitious, determined, my life planned out. That time in my life set me on a very different track.

After we left our church, my parents and I drove from California to Dallas, Texas to visit family for several weeks. We stayed with my Aunt Eileen and Uncle Tom in their home which was on the market at the time. I remember this specifically because one day I had washed my hands, and left my amethyst ring (a high school graduation gift from my parents) on the sink and went out because there was a family coming to look at the house. When I returned, the ring was gone. I searched my luggage, under the bed, in every nook and cranny. We even scoured the vacuum cleaner. It was gone. We finally determined that they ring was likely stolen by the people who were looking at the house. My parents and I returned to California, my beautiful ring lost forever and my heart even heavier.

In the last 10 years I have moved on. I mended a broken relationship with the Lord, married my wonderful husband and have had three gorgeous kids. All in all, my life is a happy one. So the events in the last few weeks, what are they to mean?

A few weekends ago my parents and I travelled to Dallas once again. It was my Grandmother's 90th birthday. Her health has been declining in the last few months, so my husband and I agreed that I should go and celebrate this special day with her.

The day of the party was a blur of food, preparation, presents, flowers, people.... My Gram looked at the gift table and saw a sparkle. "Who's ring is this?" she said.

My aunt Eileen answered that it belonged to my other aunt, Rhonda. The day went on, my Gram was glowing and looked more alive and happy than every. As the guests began to dwindle, Eileen stood near me, holding that ring and said to my mother, "I just don't know who's this could be." At that moment, the glimmer caught my eye with a distinct familiarity.

"Let me look at that...." I said cautiously.

I took the ring and slipped it on my finger and stared with bewilderment. Could this be?

"Where did you find this?"

Eileen said that my cousin had found it that morning in a gardening glove.

In a gardening glove.

10 years later.

In a different house.

In Texas.

On a day that I HAPPENED to be there.

Coincidence? Impossible. I believe that that God placed that ring in that glove and lead all the events that transpired so that I would be given that gift that day.

The story trickled through the rest of the family and guests. Reactions ranged from, how amazing, how bizarre, weird!

But the one that sticks out to me and leaves me puzzled is this:

A woman, who's name I don't know, came up to me and said with great conviction, "That ring is a symbol of God's redemption in your life. And this is just the beginning." I felt chills. I knew this was more than just words, but a message meant so very personally to me.

I know that something big is on the horizon. I know that God has amazing plans for my life and I can't wait to see how it will unfold.

"Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19.

Thought for the day

2007-12-05T11:47:00.001-08:00

"The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."

Thoughts?

Would you rather... Second Edition

2007-11-17T08:26:00.000-08:00

Leave your answers in my comments or post it on your blog! Have fun!

Would you rather....

1. Watch a porn movie with your parents or watch a porn movie starring your parents?

2. Be machined gunned to death with Lite Brite pegs or assasinated by Cabbage Patch Dolls?

3. Fight Mike Tyson or talk like him?

4. Be 3ft tall or be 9 ft tall?

5. Hate your life but everyone loves you or everyone hate you but you're having a great time?

6. Have the ability to change genders at will or change height at will?

7. Have a super long eyelash you could never pluck out or have and earlobe the size of a baseball?

8. Be able to live forever, so long as you kill someone once a week or die in 5 years?

9. Eath 3 lbs of hair or drink a gallon of shampoo?

10. be the mysterious leader of a secret society of assassin-midgets or have a direct mental link to all the world's information?

11. have caterpillars on your face moving around on your eyebrows or tral paprika everywhere you go?

Wild ride

2007-10-25T12:59:00.000-07:00

Hey all, we are doing fine here in smokey San Diego. The last several days have been a wild ride, but I happy to say that myself and everyone I know are safe and sound. We did evacuate for one night but were able to return the next day. No damage done except the think ash covering our streets, yard, car, even inside our home. I don't personally know anyone who has lost their home. But my heart goes out to the 1000+ who have to return home to find nothing but soot.

I can't help but think as I watch the ashes float down from the sky that those are someone else's memories. Perhaps remains of their wedding photos, their son's favorite blanket, or their well read Bible. Each time I brush dust off of my table I am thankful that it is still standing there to do so.

Keep San Diego in your prayers. There is a lot of heart ache abouning and many people still need prayer for their safety.

Whirlwind

2007-10-09T13:07:00.001-07:00

My life has been nutty busy lately. I am still alive. Unfortunately it has left me with such little time to blog. My kids, my business, my husband's crazy work and school scedule - YIKES!

Good news: I was promoted to District Manager with Arbonne last month. Yeah! I am having such a good time with my new business and it was a nice reward for all my hard work.

Bad News: Stinky has been just that....a stinker lately. His tantrums are rearing their ugly head again. Much crying self to sleep...me that is. He is such a good boy but so emotional. Sometimes I think I am the world's crappiest mom. But I try...so I guess that is something.

Other news: My little Red is not so little anymore. She had her big #5 birthday last weekend. We did the party at a place called Kidsville. They did everything for me and I went home to a house that was only messy because I am terrible housekeeper, not because I had a party there.
Red was happy and spoiled and nasty to her brother. All in all, a typical 5th birthday.

Some highlighted gifts for you children of the 80s:

A cool PINK flat screen Lite Brite! (Thank you Uncle D and Auntie C)

and

An alternative to the classic Easy Bake Oven. (Thank you Uncle K and Tia)

It's like being 5 all over again!

As much fun for me as Red.

I gotta go bake a mini cake now. It will taste like a brick, but what the hell.

A Good Glimpse

2007-09-20T09:10:00.000-07:00

I recently went on a business trip to Vancouver, Canada with my good friend Xandria. As we were waiting for our plane to take off, naturally, I was rummaging around in her carry on bag looking for something to entertain myself. In there I found a book called Going Overboard: The Misadventures of a Military Wife by Sarah Smiley. It didn't take me long to confiscate the book and devour it.

I don't know if I have ever read a book that hit so close to home with me. Her description of the turmoil that occurs within yourself as you watch your husband prepare to deploy was dead on. I could have been writing this book! Except I am just not that eloquent.

It is a witty and funny novel that will keep military wives as well as civilian giggling through each page.

The second half of the book, I was less in tune with. I don't want to spoil it for you, but if you read it, you'll know what I mean. The only other critique was during the part of the book where the troops are deploying it depicts the wives as completely losing control. They scream and shout things like "Don't leave, I can do this without you! Don't go!" I don't know ANY military spouses that behave like that. Your job is to be there and support your husband and be strong. I don't subscribe to the theory that you can't be sad and shed your tears. I've heard that through the years that it is wrong to let your husband see you cry as he leaves. My husband would be tossed into a panic if he left for 6 months and I just stood there smiling and waving like an idiot.

All in all though, it was a fantastic book. If you have someone close to you who is a military spouse, I highly recommend giving it a read. You just might get a glimpse into the their life that you have never seen before.

What have I been doing?

2007-09-12T07:15:00.000-07:00

Crying

Pulling hair

"Eat your breakfast!!"

Whining

Oversleeping

"Get your shoes on, we're late!"

"Hold still while I brush your hair!!"

Kicking of the little brother.

Excited smiles.

Nervous laughs.

Scared little eyes.

Crying....lots of crying.

Yep....my baby is going to kindergarten.

Did I mention the crying was all me?

Do you really want to know?

2007-08-31T07:33:00.000-07:00

In my research over the last several weeks about skin care products I have come upon some fascinating information - ranging from mildly interesting to completely shocking. I was never one to consider what exactly I was putting on my body....as long as it was under $10. Oil of Olay was getting a little crazy for me. Before starting Arbonne, it never really mattered to me or occurred to me to think about what the products contained.

Well today I am going to share with you a dirty little secret called "rendering plants". I had never heard of such places and when I first learned of them I was a little suspicious and decided to do my own research on the matter. Rendering plants, do in fact, exist. What is so disgusting about them?

A rendering plant is a place where animals, not in our food chain, are taken to be ground up and "cooked". These animals include roadkill, euthanized pets (including their collars, tags etc), farm animals, spoiled grocery meat (including the packaging) etc. As you know when you cook a chicken, the sticky fatty stuff comes to the top. This is called tallow. So when they boil these animals, they take the tallow and sell it. The first people to buy tallow? Cosmetic and skin care companies.

Tallow is used in cosmetics because it is cheap. It is also a binding agent and makes products smooth and creamy. You average bar of soap is primarily made of tallow. Look at the ingredients in your medicine chest. Alot of times it comes up as "sodium tallowate". Lipstick is often a major culprit - almost entirely tallow in many cases.

Another thing to be aware of is that anything you put on your skin takes an average of 26 seconds to reach your blood stream. What you put on your body can be found in your blood and organs. This never had occurred to me, had never been something I had cared about. But now I have small kids and these things are starting to matter. The FDA does not control what we put in our skin care and cosmetics. That means it is up to us to determine what is healthy for our lives.

If you want to do your own research, and please do, go ahead and google "rendering plants". Or you can take a look here.

I had someone ask about products without tallow, and of course, Arbonne is one of those companies. If you want to know more, please let me know.

Should I be concerned?

2007-08-20T08:09:00.000-07:00

I walked into Red's room last night and saw this:

WTF? LOL.

New Beginnings

2007-08-13T20:30:00.000-07:00

I've been lazy about blogging lately. All my free time has gone from being an internet junkie to keeping busy with the new business. I sure am loving it though. I feel like I have something of my own...I am contributing to my family in a way that I haven't been able to do in a long while...and I am really having fun.

In other news, my little Red Beast is having her final day of preschool this week. She will have 2 weeks off and then off the kindergarten. My eyes well up every time I think of it. How am I grown up enough to have an elementary school kid?? When did that happen?

So this week is full of shopping for school supplies, new shoes the whole works. Dan is silently staring at his empty wallet trying not to grimace. But it should be fun. I LOVED shopping for school stuff. I hated the school part, but the new shoes and clothes and a fresh box of Crayolas? Hell yeah!

I remember being in first grade and I had my first pencil and used it until it was down to a tiny little nub because I was too scared and embarrassed to use the pencil sharpener. Introvert? You think?

What do you remember about starting school?

Surprise!

2007-08-02T07:03:00.000-07:00

Ok, so you all know my irrational fear of the whole icky rodent thing that is lurking in my garage. Well, the other day I was outside gardening and starting gabbing to my neighbor (also named Dan we call him Mr. Dan.) about the situation and how I have laundry a mile high because I am scared to use the washing machine. It is located right there in mouse central.

Being the sweet, former Navy man that he is, he went walking into the garage, opened the dryer and started pulling the clothes out. I stood there protesting vaguely but slightly happy to see some clean towels.

The he went to open the washing machine to put those clothes in the dryer. My protesting became a little more fervent. I just KNOW I have my thong underwear in that load. He brushed me off and kept working away. Until he burst into laughter.

There in the midst of my new Victoria secret panties was also....a panty liner.

I was purple with embarrassment. He kept laughing.

Do your own damn laundry Gingers Mom.

My love

2007-07-26T10:00:00.001-07:00

Dear Sweet Double Chocolate Milano Cookie. Please stop calling my name from the pantry. I love, I want you, I need you too. My hormonal cravings make you more tempting than ever. Please don't lure me with your sweet seductive ways.

I'm in a relationship with carrot sticks and celery. They love me. They are good for me. Please don't try and come between us.

Oh, sweet Milano cookie, you are the one I want. My TRUE love.

I'll try to slip away later. When the kids are sleeping.... I'll sneak past the refrigerator quietly so the carrots and celery don't hear me and we can have one last liason. I'm coming my sweet sweet love.