Saturday, February 13, 2010

An oldie but goodie for Valentines Day

This is an old post, but fitting for V-Day.  (That's Valentines Day, not Vasectomy day.  But that was a day to celebrate too!)



Frankly, there are no other men I loved before other than my husband. Ok, ok so you are rolling your eyes right now, but I have to be honest, Dan is the ONLY man I was ever in love with. After reading this you may understand why and applaud me for jumping at the chance to marry Dan.

1. My very first date was with this very handsome guy named Bryan. He was 19 and I was 16. He met my horrible and intimidating brothers and never called again.

2. Boyfriend #1 was a friend of Dan's - who I dated AFTER dating Dan in highschool. Big mistake. Most people believe he is likely to be the next unibomber - either than or will turn into my gay neighbor Larry. My brothers hated him because he did not own 1 single pair of pants - when he went to the desert in the winter to visit his dad in prison, he had to borrow his little sister's pants.

3. Boyfriend #2 Jeff. A decent guy but we were an odd mix. I was the prim and proper pastor's daughter who loved to wear pink. He had long hair and wore torn Metallica tee shirts everywhere - including church. He barely graduated highschool and had no plans for the future - very unlike my goal oriented self, but I adored him anyway. My brothers hate HIM because they swore they saw him wear bicycle shorts one day - an unforgivable crime.

4. Boyfriend #3 Kent. He was my first serious boyfriend in college. He cried about everything. We went to go see A Walk In the Clouds on our first date and did not cry - he SOBBED. Then he looked over at me and said, "you're not crying?". He cried over everything - especially wheat fields.(He was from Montana and missed them so bad....ick) Does he need more of a reason for my brothers to hate him?

5. Boyfriend #4 Todd aka Comb Over Guy. Yes, he had a comb over. He was 24 at the time. He was also very short. I have no idea why I dated him. He had just broken up with a girl who was gorgeous. He told me I was not nearly as pretty. How is it short ugly guys get such great women? My brothers hated him purely for his comb over.

This was all before the time I was 20 years old and I was disillusioned to the world of men. And then...

6. Dan. My brothers like him. So I married him.

4 comments:

Mz.Elle said...

LOL
I love this post!
Especially,why you married Dan,too cute!

Got a new blog:) http://laelee.wordpress.com/

Anonymous said...

very useful article. I would love to follow you on twitter.

Tiffany said...

Where's Joe? AKA... "I got maulled by my cat and lived to tell the tale"?
And John, you liked him too. Or am I retarded?

Gingers Mom said...

Joe was #2! And who's John?