Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Two Introverts go to Kindergarten

Today, Dan took off work in the morning so that we could attend a class called "Jump Start to Literacy". It was a class for parents of incoming kindergartners and we were "strongly encouraged" to attend. Translated to: if you don't come we know your kid is a dum dum and we will keep her in kindergarten until she is 18. So we went.

There was alot of handouts and slides. I felt like I was back in school myself. I kept thinking about how uncomfortable my chair was and however did I make it through 17 years of school? Man am I glad it is my kids' turn and not me. Whew.

We learned alot about how to help Red learn how to read. The class was actually somewhat useful. Surprise. Armed with our new knowledge and confidence that our kid is a genius and we won't have to teach her anything because she will know how to read simply by carrying our super intelligent genes, we prepared to leave.

Alas, no we were not excused. We were then informed that the current kindergarten class would now come in and we get to use our newly learned techniques with these children....just to prove we were listening. Pop quiz for parenting??? This blows.

I love my kids. Adore them. Want to smother them with hugs and kisses kind of love. But kids....other kids freak me out. I don't know how to talk to them. I'm an introvert. It doesn't get turned off just because you are cute and small.

I looked at Dan. I don't want to do this. "You talk to it." He looks at me blankly. The smiling and timid little people are marched in and handed out to different parents. I keep hoping the kid will choose to sit next to Dan. He scooted over just in time for them to plop an adorable little girl with glasses right between us.

Nervously I look about. She looks smart. Good. Maybe she can teach us and we can just sit here and smile dumbly.

Which basically we did.

She sat down and we opened the book called Beach Things. We were supposed to just look at the pictures and talk about what we see. Before we could say anything, she starts flipping the pages and reading it so fast we couldn't get a word in edge wise. Silently I was relieved. She's so fast and smart I don't even have to think of anything to say.

At last, her teacher gathered her up and I heaved a sigh of relief. I lived to tell the tale of how I had to sit next to a kindergarten kid I don't know. And I used my uber-brilliance to help her read.

Good thing we have a genius like her at home. This is gonna be easy.

5 comments:

Dr.John said...

Parenting is never easy. But it does help if the child is a genius.

Unknown said...

Enjoy the sexy set up you have now!:).....Oy, I'm not looking forward to that when Josh is in kindergarten...-Nicki

Mz.Elle said...

Aww NO fun!

Dr.John said...

Just a note to let you know you won the Friday drawing at the Fortress.

Dr.John said...

Forgot to tell you I need your address. You can send it to

jlinna@new.rr.com

Congratulations on winning.